I suppose the problem with my slumber last night began a few minutes after Scott turned off the television. He has always snored. When we first got together, it was a cute little snore. As time has passed, his snore has morphed into a disturbing loud snorting sound. It is reminiscent of the sounds the walruses made when I went to the Philadelphia Zoo as a little girl.
I've tried piling pillows between us to block the sound. Using my elbow for encouragement, I have positioned his body on his side, facing away from me. I have even resorted to putting the pillows on top of him to thwart the horrendous sound. Nothing seems to work.
Finally, about 1:30 AM I drifted off to sleep. I'm not kidding when I tell you that I had dreamt that I was on a fishing boat being led to shore by the fog horns. I suppose I just incorporated the snoring into my dream.
At 3:00 I was awoken by Robby. Apparently monsters had invaded his room again. I put on my leg and escorted him back to his room.
After thoroughly examining his bedroom, including under the bed and in the closet, it was determined that the monsters had left. Just to be sure we sprayed "monster spray" on his bed. Robby crawled back into his race car bed and I tucked him in. He asked me to stay because he was still "ascared."
My heart actually skipped a beat when he asked me to sleep in his room. His room would be quiet! My little guy had provided his Mommy with the perfect excuse to escape the sound pollution permeating my bedroom.
I took the cushions off the sofa in Robby's room and pulled out the bed. I took off my leg. Unfortunately I realized that I had left my pillow on the other side of the room.
I debated whether or not I should put on my leg. I opted to keep it off. For whatever reason, I really detest putting on my prosthetic after I have taken it off for the night. Logically, I know that putting my leg on is the wiser choice. It takes only a few seconds to slip into it. I suppose I just resent having to do it, so I opt to hop.
Hopping was a mistake. With my first hop my foot landed directly on top of Robby's Thomas the Train Engine. Ouch! I took a small step to relieve the pain and landed on top of the cushions that I had just removed from the couch. I came crashing down with half of me landing on the cushions and my shoulders landing on the "hood" of the race car bed.
After convincing Robby that the commotion was NOT caused by monsters, I retrieved my pillow. I crawled over to the sofa bed and rubbed my sore shoulder. I was mad at myself for not putting on my leg. I was tired. Finally, I would be able to sleep.
Then I realized I had forgotten to turn off the light. Robby has started using his Christmas tree as his nightlight, but it is brighter than I realized. In reality, it resembles the northern lights. If I were going to sleep, I needed to cut the illumination.
Again, I debated whether or not I should put on my leg. Hopping was quickly eliminated as a possibility. I devised a solution. I grabbed my leg and took aim. With one well calculated sweeping motion, I managed to reach the light switch to turn off the tree. I put the leg down, pulled up the covers and closed my eyes.
I was just drifting off to sleep when it started. At first it was a soft noise, nothing too offensive. With time, the volume began to increase. I discovered that, just like his Daddy, Robby snores!
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