I adore my kids, but I am fully aware that they are far from perfect.
Like all kids, they can be sneaky, mischievous and stubborn (sometimes
striking the trifecta simultaneously.) I trust Robby, but I also
realize that he is a nine year old boy who is prone to peer pressure and
uninhibited exploration. I know that he will make mistakes, but I also
believe that at his core he is a good kid.
When I find
out that a neighbor has been complaining about Robby, you can be damn
sure I will confront the accuser. I want to know if my child is
misbehaving, and if issues are present I will deal with it. What I won't
do is allow our family to be defamed by a bored gossip monger who feels
a false sense of security shielded by manipulating others into doing
her dirty work.
Yesterday Mr. Bill came over and
confided that a neighbor has been complaining about Robby and Jack
playing outside too much. They weren't complaining about noise, but
rather that they were making the stream bed muddy. I never considered
that a stream bed would be free of mud, but I digress. Instead of
coming to speak with me and Scott, they decided to jump to the extreme
action of securing a No Trespassing order. Again, they are hiding behind
a bureaucrat instead of dealing with the concerns like polite
neighbors.
While I do not relish confrontation, I
will always defend my child. By the time I picked up Robby from school I was fuming. I decided to drive
directly to the neighbors house, partly because I wanted to confront her with the information but also because I wanted to demonstrate to Robby that there are appropriate ways of handling conflicts. I could see her peeking through her
curtains when I was driving down the street, so it was no surprise that
she met me at the door before I had a chance to knock. I was livid but
remained so calm I felt an oddly liberating sense of pride. In a steady
voice, I began the conversation by saying, "I understand that you have
an issue with my kids. I'd like to know what is going on instead of
hearing second hand from all of our neighbors."
Needless
to say, this individual is quick to turn everybody in for whatever
violation she deems worthy, yet was not accustomed to being directly
confronted. I let her him-haw about the boys venturing onto her side of
the stream, rambling about worries of them muddying the creek bed by
playing. I assured her that Robby has been instructed to never set foot
on her property again. I promised that I would make sure that Timmy
would also learn to avoid her property at all costs, and that he would
never step foot on her land either. I also reminded her that the
waterway is technically public property and that the boys are permitted
to be in the stream because it is not owned by them.
She
was taken aback when I also stated that I was going to be posting signs
along the property line so it is clearly delineated for the boys.She
just nodded and stammered about not wanting to be seen as difficult or
unwelcoming.
Um, too late for that one. As far as I'm concerned, we
have a new crazy old lady on the street! Before leaving, I did request
that any issues with my boys be taken directly to me instead of all of
the neighbors. I offered that it puts everybody in an awkward situation
and that, as a mother, I'm sure she understands the desire to deal with
these issues directly. Strange, somebody so quick to pick up the phone
to complain was lacking the words to converse with me.
So,
today I will go outside and post "Keep Out" signs along our property
line. I'm also in the market for some visually interesting yard art to
decorate the stream and Robby Island, which happens to be in full view
from their back deck. What do you think? I am open to any and all yard art suggestions (the tackier the better of course).