D'Oh. I Hate it When That Happens

Robby has been clingy since I have come home. I can't go to the bathroom without his talking to me through the door. I love him, but his neediness is driving me batty! Last night I reached my breaking point. In fact, I was so desperate for some alone time that I did something I haven't done in months: I laced up my shoes and went for a jog.

Only I couldn't find my running shoes. I vaguely remembering throwing the worn out shoes away in a moment of zealous cleaning earlier this summer. Undeterred, I put my Shape-Ups on, grabbed my cell phone and took off out the door. I figured that if the shoes were good for walking, they should be great for running.

Almost immediately I realized I had made a mistake. Somehow the alignment on my running leg was altered by the Shape-Up shoe. With each stride forward my prosthetic foot turned inward, making it difficult to maintain my balance.

I stopped to adjust the socket, hoping to rectify the alignment issue. I thought about abandoning my jog and returning home. I then remembered that a needy, clingy and whiny preschooler was waiting for me. I decided to try to make the best of my misaligned leg and to keep jogging.

After struggling initially with the alignment, I was able to compensate enough to jog. I covered one mile without difficulty. I was impressed with the distance and the ease at which I was jogging. Feeling confident (or cocky) I began to think about jogging on a regular basis, and even toyed with the notion of competing in another race.

I have always felt self-consciounse about the aesthetics of my running style. I am the antithesis of smooth and graceful. Instead of looking like a gazelle or a cheetah, I am fully aware that I resemble an injured cow trotting through a muddy field. Nevertheless, I decided to feign confidence and began to nod and wave to the cars that passed me.

A red sports car convertible, driven by a strikingly handsome man, passed me. I nodded as he drove by, and he waved. I then waved, and ran a little faster because he was watching in the rear view mirror. Increasing my speed was a mistake.

Before I could react, I was face first in a pile of dirt on the side of the road. My running leg had turned inward again, tripping me up. Stunned, I sat on the ground for a moment, hoping that nobody noticed. I don't like it when I fall, but I really hate it when it happens in front of people!

I looked up to see the handsome driver stop his car, get out and run towards me. So did the driver of the car behind me and the man who was mowing his lawn. Within seconds of my fall. I had three concerned witnesses offering assistance. I regained my composure and immediately stood up. I wasn't hurt, except of course, for my ego.

In spite of my tumble, I have decided that I am going to continue jogging. I need an outlet for my stress and I know that I benefit from the time alone. Of course, I'm not jogging anywhere until I visit the shoe store to buy a new pair of sneakers. Shape-Ups are good for walking, but jogging in them is hazardous to my health and my self-esteem!