Our typically peaceful house became a battleground, pitting team
Robby Rotten against his family. His snarky attitude paired with fatigue
created an absolute pre-teen monster. I really miss my sweet little Koopa.
Somehow Scott and I manage to hold down jobs, pay the bills, and
maintain the household despite the fact that we are wrong about everything. How
have we survived so long without a know-it-all ten year old to point out every
perceived mistake! Robby Rotten, tween version, has an opinion about
everything. Here's the abridged version: He is right and apparently wise beyond
his years. Everything his parents do is stupid, nonsensical and just plain
wrong. In short, he is a genius and we are idiots.
Although he has eaten the meals I prepare for over 10 years,
apparently what used to be one of his favorites is now a "bowl of hot
horse diarrhea." Our Halloween decorations are "lame" and he
shouldn't have to put down the toilet seat because there are three males and
only one female in the house. Being outnumbered, he should be able to "pee
like a man in a castle." (It is a
good thing that Snarky Robby Rotten was able to enlighten me about how men in
castles pee.)
Scott's beloved Ohio State Buckeyes lost on Saturday because he
always picks "stupid teams." The internet is slow because our house
"sucks." Somehow his dying in
a video game is the fault of a pizza roll that I managed to ruin. Who knew I so many talents!
Over the weekend his attitude escalated to a full blown war. I
understand that this is a stage, but I'm not going to be disrespected in my own
home by my ten year old son. It just isn't going to be tolerated. He isn't
enjoying his restrictions, but it was necessary to reassert our authority. I'm
not loving this stage, and I hope that Robby Rotten- Tween Edition doesn't stay
long. I really miss my sweet little Koopa, and I hate being a mean Mom. (By the
way, I am apparently the meanest, most horrible Momom in the world.)
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