Teamwork

Everybody is finally reunited under the same roof, and it feels wonderful to be together and to be home. I had a fantastic (albeit busy and hectic) time at conference, and it was difficult to say goodbye both to the beautiful location and to my dear friends. However, all good things must come to an end, and I was ready to come home. At my core, I am a homebody.

After a long day of traveling on Sunday, yesterday was spent doing nothing of consequence. I picked up a little bit around the house, but primarily just relaxed and enjoyed playing with the boys. I was away from Timmy for a week, but it felt like he grew up significantly. He is quicker and seemingly more mischievous than he was when I left for Arizona. I was content just to spend the afternoon playing with him.

Although I know he had a great time with his Nana, Timmy seemed delighted to return home. He was all action and giggles when he returned. He was excited to show me his new trick (walking backwards) and spent hours rediscovering all of his toys. Robby was happy to be home, but his reactions were a bit more tempered. He was content to quietly play his XBox and relax with cartoons.

Today we will settle back into our routines, which means that I will be busy. It is amazing how things pile up after just a few days away! Thankfully Scott is home from school and will be able to help with the laundry, eliminating one looming item from my to do list. Hopefully, working together, we can finish everything in time to visit the pool before it closes.

Leaving Oz

This past weekend was one full of emotions. I missed Timmy terribly, and couldn't wait to get home and hold him again. While I loved hearing the tales of his (mis)adventures from my Mom, part of me hurt with each conversation because I was missing everything. Logically I knew that I was being silly, that he wasn't going to completely change or forget me in a few short days. My heart fluctuated between believing my logical explanations and missing my baby so much I was ready to start walking home to get to him.

By Sunday morning I was awake early, packed and ready to go home. Walking down into the hotel lobby, I was swarmed by my amputee friends saying goodbye. I always hate goodbyes!  Not only was I hugging dear friends, I knew that I was also bidding farewell to the wonderful feeling of being in the norm. I left the fantastic and empowering land of Oz, where nobody stares and gawks, where legs and arms setting by the pool was the norm, where those missing limbs were in the majority and we weren't considered "disabled," as soon as I exited the hotel lobby and climbed into the van for the airport.  It will definitely take me a few days to acclimate to being the oddity. 

I flew all day (and most of the night), finally walking through my front door around three in the morning. I had a wonderful time at conference, but it is time to get back to reality. I can't wait to be reunited with Timmy later this morning, and to spend some quality time with my family.  Oz was wonderful to visit, but there is no place like home!

Tucson Day 3

Despite being in constant motion and falling into bed late every night exhausted, I am having a wonderful time in Tucson. I relish spending time with my amputee friends, laughing and sharing stories that only those living with limb loss can understand.  There is something empowering about being around individuals who are living the same reality.

I have been overwhelmed with hugs and kind words from readers of this blog. I can't help but smile whenever somebody approaches and asks if I am the AmputeeMommy. I have met so many new friends during this conference, and I am looking forward to keeping in touch with all of them. 

Conference Day 2

I have come to the unfortunate conclusion that I just don't have time to write reflective and insightful blogs while working at the conference.  Yesterday I began work at 6:30 and was in non-stop movement until I finally made it back to my room at 10:00 PM.  While I love seeing all of my friends, I am exhausted by the time I collapse into bed at night.

While I was busy working at the conference, Scott and Robby took advantage of the opportunity to visit the Grand Canyon. They took the Grand Canyon train to and from the Canyon, and seemed to have a fantastic time.  Part of me wishes that I had been able to join them, but I also appreciate that this was a perfect father/son bonding opportunity. This has been an adventure that Robby (and Scott) will always remember fondly. 

 I can't wait to hear all about their adventure when they join me this evening! 

Worn Out

Hello from Tucson!

After my 22 hour day of travel and work, I am exhausted.  I woke up at 2 AM to make my painfully early flight, and didn't fall into bed until well after midnight. I began working to stuff conference bags almost as soon as I arrived at the hotel.  Obviously the task was not difficult, but it was tedious and tiring. 

After the last bag was stuffed, more than anything I wanted to just climb into bed, pull the covers over my head and fall asleep. But my plans had to wait because I was committed to attending the staff dinner. The dinner was enjoyable, but to be honest it was a bit of a blur.

Today I am attending the peer visitor certification course. I figured that I have been doing peer visits for a decade, so perhaps it is time to become officially certified. I am eager to compare the "certified" approach against what I have been doing on instinct. 

Hopefully today will not be nearly as long, and I'll be able to carve out some time to actually enjoy the resort. 

Tucson Bound

Yesterday was so busy that the anticipated tearful good-bye to Timmy never transpired. While I was sad to see him driven away, I just didn't have time to break down. Our pre-vacation list of things to do was overflowing and time was short.

We spent the day running errands, packing and trying to clean up around the house. I've abandoned all aspirations of returning home to a clean and uncluttered home. As I surveyed the destruction in my home, my goals became more pragmatic. I would like to not be hit with the stench of rotting diapers, baby formula or rotting meat when we return.  I guess we won't know if we were successful until we return.

After the housesitters were made comfortable, I set out to charge all of Scott and Robby's portable electronics. By the time they were all plugged in to juice up all of the electric outlets in my kitchen were occupied. DS systems were relegated to the corner of the dining room.  Despite my frequent reminders and a note on the kitchen counter, I am fairly certain that they will be forgotten. 

By the time the sun rises I'll be in the air, en route to Tucson.  I'm looking forward to seeing my friends, and to being reunited with Scott and Robby in a few days. I know that they are going to thoroughly enjoy their Grand Canyon adventure, and I can't wait to hear all about it!

Nana Vacation

I have been dreading today ever since I learned that I would be attending the conference in Tucson.  While I'm excited to be reunited with my friends for a few days, I know that my attending does not come without a sacrifice from my Mom. She will be watching Timmy for the week, and today is the day that I pack him up and send him to Nana's.

My Mom has been anticipating his visit by going to baby consignment shops and stocking up on toys and a small pool. I have no doubt that my little Hamlet will be spoiled, busy and happy. Between my Mom, my sister and his cousins, I know that he will be entertained and probably won't miss me at all.

Even though he won't spend time lamenting my absence, I will miss him terribly. The thought of being away from him for a week has been bringing me to tears. I suspect that I have been driving my Mom crazy by putting off scheduling the Timmy hand-off. I know that we are going to have to meet today so that she can take him to her house, but I find the thought of saying good-bye overwhelming.  Of course, avoidance only works so long and today he will begin his week long adventure at Nana's. 

As I am watching Timmy run around the room giggling, I am feeling an uncomfortable combination of sadness and guilt. Logically I know that we are doing the right thing by letting him stay with my Mom instead of accompanying us to Arizona. Timmy would be miserable cloistered in a hotel room with minimal toys and none of the comforts of home. Since this is a working trip for me, I would not be available to provide the constant entertainment he would require. 

This morning I have one more medical test, and then we will pack up Timmy and drive to meet my Mom. I know that he is going to be spoiled and happy, so I am trying not to think about how much I am going to miss him.