Nightmare Vision

Occasionally I am profoundly affected by a story that I read or hear on the news. I was moved to tears and perseverated for days when I learned about the individuals with Albinism who were being hunted because their amputated limbs were touted to have medicinal value. Last night I heard about another event that moved me, and I have not been able to put it out of my mind.

I saw a fleeting reference to a "mob boss" in Bangladesh who was arrested for amputating the limbs of children. I searched on-line to learn more about this story and continued to hope that the teaser was an exaggeration. I was horrified when, as I dug deeper, I realized that the details were more horrific than anyone could have imagined.

Begging in Bangladesh is common for residents of this poverty stricken country. With begging children plentiful, the sympathy that was elicited was fading. In order to make more money, an organized crime ring decided to make the common toddler and young child more lucrative.

Over 15 children, all born with healthy limbs, are now amputees. They were attacked and had their limb (sometimes more than one) bludgeoned off with a machete. The young victims were then forced into servitude as beggars to earn money.

I tossed and turned last night, my mind racing with the gory details. I ended up moving to the pull-out sofa so that I could spare Scott a sleepless night. No matter how I tried to think of other things, my mind kept returning to the conjured images of those sweet little children and their horrified parents.

I had nightmares imagining Robby being torn from my arms to suffer as similar fate. The thought of his being maimed in such a heinous fashion makes me queasy, terrified, furious and grateful to live in Virginia. I feel guilty fretting and worrying over issues in my life when I realize what other people are enduring.

To put it simply, this under-reported news story has broken my heart. I know that this post is neither uplifting nor humorous, and I apologize. I guess I just needed to verbalize my feelings about this news story as an attempt to put the visions to rest.

Stories like this affect me differently now that I am an amputee and a mother. I wonder if I would have had this profound reaction if my situation were different. I never appreciated how precious it is to have a healthy child or have intact limbs before I became an amputee Mommy.

Last night, I migrated from my bed to the pull-out sofa in the living roomand then to the red race car bed in Robby's room. I knew that he was sound asleep and didn't need me. I suppose I needed to see him. With Robby continuing to feel ill (he is now on a different antibiotic) I am going to take every opportunity to cuddle with him, sneaking in extra hugs and kisses whenever I can!