Resolution Reaffirmed

If I remember correctly, my New Year's resolution was to take better care of myself. I vowed to give myself time to relax and simply enjoy life with my family. I recognized that in order to be happier and healthier, taking an occasional "Peggy break" was not selfish and promised to renew myself with a break on a regular basis.

Unfortunately stress and anxiety have reared their destructive heads during the weeks since my well-meaning commitment. I've been busy every moment in hopes that I would become so tired that I would be able to sleep. Exhausted, I fall into bed to find myself unable to drift off. I've been running on fumes and caffeine. Like 90% of the population, I've failed to keep my New Year's resolution.

This past weekend, Robby and I visited my mom in Pennsylvania. This was my first visit in months that I didn't have a lengthy "to do" list. With no places to visit and with it too windy to work outside, I was left in an unusual situation. I had nothing to do on Saturday.

My mom urged me to go downstairs to relax and to watch a movie. I protested because I did not want to leave her with the responsibility for watching Robby. I was then issued a stern yet loving motherly directive. I begrudgingly went downstairs, leaving Robby and his Nana to their own devices.

With the exception of being sick or recovering from a surgery, it has been years since I've taken the opportunity to simply sit and watch a movie. I was able to watch what I chose without making apologies. I chose "About a Boy" because it stars Hugh Grant and, well, he's cute.

After about 15 minutes of fretting, I began to lose myself in the movie. I wasn't thinking about my typical stress triggers. In fact, I wasn't thinking at all, and it felt wonderful!

Robby and my mom were having such a good time that I was informed that my matinee had turned into a double feature. I was handed a glass of water and told to return to watch another movie. I didn't hesitate to accept the reprieve.

I immediately fell into the storyline of Billy Elliot. At times I wanted to stand up and dance, but I knew that I would probably get hurt. (I really wish I could dance!) The movie ended and I was left both relaxed and smiling, two attributes that have been scarce in the past weeks.

To my delight, Saturday night I was able to sleep-- in fact I slept for 11 straight hours! Feeling refreshed has reminded me how I have been neglecting to take care of myself. The simple act of allowing myself to indulge in watching a movie, without worrying about occupying Robby or taking care of another chore, was enough to help me recharge.

It's not New Year's, but I think that this is a good time to recommit to my failed resolution. I may not always have the chance to sit and watch an entire movie, but I need to find the time to take care of myself without feeling guilty. I deserve to always feel this refreshed! Thanks, Mom-- I guess you still know best.