This morning, after driving Robby to school and probably pulling his tear stained little face away from my side (again), I'll come home and pack my suitcase. I will drive to the airport and catch a flight to Boston. For the next few days I'll be working at the AOPA conference, talking with Prosthetists and exploring new technology.
I have traditionally loved working at conferences. The venue affords me the opportunity to stretch my professional wings and surround myself with adult conversation. Unfortunately, this year's conference comes during Robby's first week of school. For the first time since I started working as a model for Ossur, I really do not want to go on this trip!
Robby has had a difficult time adjusting to school. Each morning he has been sobbing, pleading for me to allow him to stay home. It has been breaking my heart pulling him away from my side and handing him off to his teacher. Knowing that I am only a phone call away, and that I will come in to volunteer at a moment's notice, has been my ace in the hole. Robby has taken solace in the fact that I remain accessible, even if I am not physically in the room. I worry about how he will deal with the transition in my absence.
I feel like I am somehow shirking my mom duties by going to Boston. I am torn because I want to stay home for him, but I also want to continue to grow professionally. I suppose that this internal struggle has been fought for as long as mom's have been in the workforce. No matter what choice is made, I will always have doubt.
I am grateful that Mr. Bill has volunteered to help with chauffeur
duties for the remainder of the week. He'll be picking Robby up, and
taking him to school on Friday. I'll be curious to hear if Robby cries
when he is dropped off on Friday, or if Mr. Bill caves and brings him
Physically I will be in Boston, but my heart will remain with my little guy a he struggles to adjust to school. I will feel better Friday afternoon, when he is home and with his Daddy for the weekend. I can't wait to hear all about his adventures when I get home. In the meantime, I'm going to try to leave my mommy anxieties in Virginia and enjoy my time in Boston.