Wing Man

With the weather finally breaking, Timmy and I have been able to spend more time outside. Although I have seen Mr. Bill in passing and for brief visits, I haven't really been able to sit and chat with him in a few months.  (Neither of us "do" cold weather and tend to become hermits during the winter.) Sunday afternoon Timmy and I spent almost two hours on Mr. Bill's back deck swing, just talking and catching up. Before leaving, we made plans to go to Cracker Barrel for breakfast on Monday.

Mr. Bill adores going to Cracker Barrel, and yesterday I learned that his motives were not entirely pure. As he explained to me before we left, a lot of single ladies his age tend to congregate for breakfast at Cracker Barrel. He also added that Mondays, more than any other day of the week, seem to be the morning that the "hot grandmas" choose to get together for breakfast.  I found this observation odd for two specific reasons. First of all, I was surprised that Mr. Bill has been tracking the breakfast dining habits of his female counterparts for some time and has accumulated enough information to be deemed an expert. Secondly, I knew that at that very moment my mom was on her way to meet her friends for their scheduled Monday morning breakfast.

Instead of just being a dining companion, I quickly realized my real purpose: he needed a cover for his hot grandma reconnaissance.  As it turned out, I was Mr. Bill's wing man!

As soon as we entered the restaurant, he began to put on the charm. He smiled broadly to all of the single ladies, offering up casual conversation with an ease that I found both endearing and impressive.  He referred to all potential dates as "my dear" or "my lovely" and insisted that the group of women (all senior citizens) get seated before us because "such beauty should never have to wait." He may be 73, but he can definitely still work a room. 

As we were eating, the ladies who were seated ahead of us stopped by our table to say good-bye. (I must admit it was odd seeing this generation flirt so openly.) They thanked him for allowing them to jump the line (an obvious grasp for a conversation starter) and wished him a good day.  Without missing a beat, Mr. Bill responded by saying, "My day will be measurably better if I knew that I would see you lovely ladies next Monday for breakfast."

After they gushed and plans were made to meet the following Monday, Mr. Bill wouldn't stop smiling. I wasn't sure how to respond, but he winked and filled the void.  "Looks like I have plans for breakfast next week Buddy, but did you know that Tuesday is Senior Citizen Day at IHOP? How do you feel about catching some lunch with Old Mr. Bill next week?" 

Obviously spring is in the air.