Dedication

A few days ago I received a package in the mail that both surprised and delighted me. Instead of the typical parcel of diapers from Amazon, this package was hand addressed and boasted foreign stamps in the corner. After setting Timmy up with Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and a snack, I took my package into the only private place in my home.

Standing in the bathroom, I carefully opened the package and pulled out a paperback book. I opened the book to a flagged page and was gobsmacked. The book was beautifully dedicated to me!  I was left speechless and as giddy as a child on Christmas morning.  

Abby reached out to me last year when she was seeking information to develop a character for her book. I answered her questions, and we corresponded sporadically over the months. I was impressed with her questions and her dedication to portray limb loss in the correct light. The fact that she wanted to make sure that every detail was accurate and true is a testament to her professionalism.

I was happy to help her with the research because it is important that amputees are portrayed accurately across all media. In my wildest dreams, I never imagined that she would dedicate her book to me. Her beautiful description has left me dumbfounded.  In my opinion I only answered a few questions and the honor feels misplaced, but I will humbly accept the accolades. 

I can't wait to read the book!  

First Day Recap

The first day of sixth grade is now in the books. No tears were shed this year, but that doesn't mean that the drive to school was void of complaining or moaning. Robby took full advantage of the drive time by vocalizing his displease with the end of summer and the beginning of a new school year.  By the time we arrived, all of my new school year blues had dissipated and I was ready for him to just get out of the car.

Although I didn't cry dropping him off, Timmy certainly had a strong reaction. He started to cry as we drove into the parking lot and had dissolved to full blown tears by the time his brother opened the door and said goodbye. No words could console my little heartbroken Hamlet. He loved having his brother home all summer and was devastated to see him leave. I tried to explain that we would pick him up in a few hours, but my efforts fell on deaf ears.  Thankfully a quick detour through the Chick Fil A drive thru helped to soothe some of his grief, and I was treated to a quiet car ride home.

After we arrived home I looked through the photos we took before leaving for school. I was struck by two startling realizations. First, Robby looked grown up. He no longer resembles the cute little elementary school boy, and he is growing into a handsome young man. Seeing him through this new lens is going to take time, but I can't deny that he is looking more like a teenager than a child. 

My second epiphany was far more painful to accept. I realized that I am slowly turning into a whale. I was enormous in the photos! I knew that I had gained some weight, but I didn't realize my size until I saw the photos. I spent the majority of the morning spiraling through a tornado of self-loathing and disgust. 

By mid afternoon I had decided my only option was to regain control. I popped Sweating to the Oldies into my DVD player and got to work. Timmy was more than happy to "help" me dance, and before I knew it, I was a sweaty mess and he was giggling with happiness and laughter. I was surprised by how out of shape I had become, but at least I made a move in the right direction. I know it isn't going to be easy, but with my little dancer by my side, I know I can sweat those extra pounds off!

Sixth Grade!

Today is the first day of school for my not-so-little sixth grader. I am having a hard time grasping that my little Koopa is no longer in elementary school. My goodness time is going too quickly.

Robby isn't delighted with our returning to the school schedule, but I think he will be happy to be reunited with his friends. I know that he has been bored the past few weeks, and some academic stimulation will be a welcome distraction. Of course, he will never admit it and spent the weekend lamenting the conclusion of summer.  

Although his grade has changed, Robby will be staying in the same school for another year. We debated about sending him to the public school this year but ultimately decided that it would be better for him to keep him where he has been attending. Next year we will probably transition, but for now we are comfortable with the decision and looking forward to another year of academic adventures.   

Labor Day Lamenting

If you have been reading my blog over the years, you already know that I despise Labor Day. Even as a child, I found the notion of celebrating the end of summer nonsensical. Why would anybody want to celebrate the end of carefree and fun summer days? The advent of school, and the return of homework and after school activities do not warrant a party!  

The past few weeks have been hectic with work travel and new school year preparations. I'm happy to spend a low key Labor Day at home, picking up around the house and not doing anything terribly taxing. The front yard is a mess with plastic toys, water hoses and the assorted remnants of summertime fun. Today I'd like to get the yard cleaned up, but I'm not terribly optimistic that any of us will gather the motivation to actually do it. I'm just too tired to nag, and I could use a day off. The toys will undoubtedly be there tomorrow, and maybe then I can convince Timmy to help me.

It is hard to believe that Robby is starting 6th grade tomorrow. He is excited about seeing his friends but is quick to point out that he is not looking forward to going back to class. I'm sure he will be fine when he gets back into the swing of our school year routine. This week will be rough, but soon we'll all be back on track. I do think that Timmy is going to miss his brother and the excitement of having everybody at home. I'm pretty sure he is going to be high maintenance this week, demanding constant attention and entertainment until everybody returns home.  Hopefully it won't take long for him to adjust to just hanging out with boring old Momom each day. I know I'm not nearly as funny or entertaining as his brother, but I will do my best to fill the void.

Because our grill broke, we will probably break with tradition by forgoing the obligatory barbecue and instead eat spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. I am not completely anti-tradition though; we will go out for ice cream for lunch.  Happy Labor Day, regardless of how you decide to celebrate.

HOME

After an eventful few days in San Francisco, it was especially nice to come home!  I arrived home in the early evening, affording me a little bit of time to play with Timmy before he went to bed. I'm looking forward to spending the day with them, playing at the farm and just having fun.  After being away for four days I'm feeling the need for some dedicated kid time.

I'll post some pics this evening.

Cab #405

Yesterday morning I experienced an issue which left me baffled, angry and confused for the remainder of the day.  To be honest I'm still confused by the incident but I'm slowly coming to terms with the knowledge that I may never understand the irrational and ignorant behavior that was exhibited.  By now I should know that it is fruitless to try to reap logic out of ignorance!

After grabbing a latte and bagel (my traveling treats), I asked the Desk Clerk at the hotel to call me a cab so I could head to the office.  After the cab was confirmed I headed outside and chatted with the valet while waiting. A few minutes later cab #405 pulled up, and I headed towards the vehicle.

As I moved to open the door, the driver opened his door and started to run around the car, shouting towards me. It took me a few seconds for his words to register, but they were ringing clear for everybody in the vicinity to witness. "I'm not taking someone like you.  I'm not taking someone like you."

I'm sure I went wide-eyed like a deer as he was screaming. Thinking that perhaps he was expecting a different fare, I explained that the hotel had called the cab for me. He stormed past both me and the valet and into the lobby, where he continued to direct his rant to the Desk Clerks.

He furiously yelled "I'm not taking someone like her.  I'm not taking someone like her." The Desk Clerks looked shocked as they tried to confirm that she had called the cab for me. He slammed his hand on the desk, stormed out of the lobby and sped away in his cab.  I was left in the hotel lobby, confused, embarrassed and late for work.

The Desk Clerks were apologetic as they contacted another company to secure me a cab. I assured them that his behavior was not a reflection of her and thanked her for her time. I managed to maintain my composure, but inside I felt like curling into a corner to cry.  While it is true that the driver's outburst was not a reflection of her, it was most definitely a response to me.

It is a horribly deflating feeling to have somebody find you so revolting that they would rather cause a public scene than to let you into their vehicle. I was dressed modestly and was well-groomed. At this point I can only assume that his reaction was caused by my amputation, but it is hard for me to accept that this level of discrimination and blatant ignorance exists in 2017. I have spent the past 24 hours desperately trying to figure out another variable.

Because the behavior was so irrational I decided to pursue the issue. It turns out that the Desk Clerks were aligned and had already contacted the Taxi Commission to report the incident. I understand that the Taxi Commission became more interest when the hotel representatives offered tapes of the exchange.  Apparently they have cameras both outside and inside the lobby, and the footage confirms our accounts of the incident.

I feel somewhat vindicated by the knowledge that this driver will be held accountable for his outburst, but I continue to struggle with the incident. How could the prospect of driving me be so vile that he reacted so strongly?  Why did my prosthesis (if that was indeed the lightening rod for his rage) bother him to the point of refusing service? Why was I not good enough to get into his cab?

My self-esteem took a hit from his outrageous and ignorant fool, but I'll rebound. I already feel stronger with the knowledge that he has been reported. I will never truly understand prejudice because I don't relate to the thought pattern.  Instead of arguing and getting into a screaming match I stayed calm, held my head high and took the incident to a higher authority.  I'm proud of my response and I'm working to let go of the negative emotions that have been stirred by the incident.

High School Reunion (abbreviated)

Last night I had the opportunity to reunite with a childhood friend.  Vince and I met in Nursery School and he was a fixture in my school life through elementary, middle and high school. It's odd to reflect and realize that I saw him every school day through my formative years. What is stranger is the reality that I haven't seen him since our high school graduation 25 years ago.  On a side note, how did 25 years pass since I was in high school?  Yikes!

Vince and I did what most middle-aged high school friends end up doing when they are reunited- we hit the bar and went out to eat. It turns out that relaxing with an old friend, catching up and reminiscing was just what I needed. My stress level evaporated as we chatted and I credit him as much as the cocktails. 

It's amazing how lives can take such drastic turns, but childhood memories keep those formative bonds lit. It was fun thinking back and recalling our elementary school memories. My goodness it feels like I grew up in a different world!

After my brief escape from adulthood, today I'm returning to the office for another day of meetings. Timmy has settled down for my Mom, which has been a huge relief. Hopefully the trend will continue today and he will be charming and happy until I return tomorrow. Fingers crossed!