Scammer Calls

Despite having logged our phone number on the Do Not Call registry, we seem to receive more than our share of unsolicited inquiries and offers. Most of the time I simply decline and politely end the call. After all, I try never to forget that there is a human on the other end of the receiver simply trying to make a living. The only time I break with the polite protocol is when I recognize the tell tale signs of a scammer. When somebody calls me with a dishonest intentions, I pass the call to Scott.  One of my husband's guilty pleasures is serving scammers a dose of their own medicine.

Foreign based scammers trying to gain control of a computer under the guise of working for Windows "technical support" are among the most despicable and is the group which elicits the strongest response from Scott. He always begins the conversation by acting like a computer illiterate and trusting consumer. He obliges the scammer by pretending to input the code into the computer as he awaits the opportunity to turn the table. Without much notice, my mild mannered husband morphs into an outrageous loud mouth as the conversation progresses from the technical to the personal.

Yesterday we received another call from "technical support," asserting that our computer has been phoning home with some malware viruses. Recognizing the scam, I handed the phone to Scott who smiled broadly and settled into his chair. I could tell from his demeanor that he was anticipating an animated exchange.  He kept the caller on the phone for 30 minutes as he feigned fumbling on the computer. After he became bored, he asked the caller if his mother knew that he was a "low life scammer who can't earn an honest living."

The conversation went downhill from that point. At one point the scammer said that he was going to come to America, find our house and have sex with his wife and daughter. Scott told him that he probably couldn't use his "millimeter Peter" and suggested that he hang barbells from his little "bb balls" to try to stretch like Gumby into a "real man."  Robby, overhearing the conversation, ended up rolling on the floor squealing with laughter as he visualized the scenario. 

After almost an hour of ranting and slinging insults back and forth, the call was finally disconnected. Although Scott was quite amused by the exchange, it didn't take long for me to realize that the scammers are having the last laugh.  Our phone didn't stop ringing all night with a slew of foreign based solicitations, dead lines and nonsensical laughing. 

Despite hanging up the phone call, apparently the scammers are enjoying the last laugh.