Last Day

 Today is the last day of school!

Well, it's the last day for Scott and Hamlet.  Robby still has a few projects until he is finished for the year, but I have no doubt he will wrap everything up quickly.  Soon everybody will be on vacation - except, of course, for me. Eh. Even though I won't have the luxury of the same carefree schedule, I'm determined to relax and unwind this summer.

I look back on this school year with astonishment. Both Robby and Timmy have grown immensely. This year has brought more independence to Robby. I look at him and I see an emerging college student, ready to fly. I'm not ready, but next year he will be a Senior regardless of my emotional readiness. I suppose I need to just sit back and enjoy the stage. 

Over the past nine months, Timmy has shown tremendous growth in every area. The adjustment to his new school was difficult for both of us.  I remember crying in the bathroom during those first few weeks of school. I'd wake up panicked because we had to do it all over again. I think only he and I truly understand the frustrations of those first few days and weeks. 

I'm proud of us.  Not only did we emerge on the other side (summer), but he has thrived through the experience.  

Bring on summer vacation. We have all earned it!

Spirit Week

The excitement in our house is reaching a feverish pitch. Timmy and Scott are beyond excited about the closing of their respective school years. Robby's enthusiasm is tempered because he still has a few more projects to finalize before he is done. Regardless, the end is in sight and summer is on the horizon. 

This school year has been one of growth and transition. Timmy and I began the year in tears, frantic and overwhelmed about the coming months. Now we are in the homestretch and he has stepped up to the challenge. I am so incredibly proud of him. This year was not easy, but we did it. Not only did we survive, but he has thrived.  

We are almost over, but we have a few days left. This is Spirit Week at school, and yesterday was silly hat day. In preparation, I pulled a variety of hats in the morning so that he could have a choice. He rejected all of my options and insisted on wearing Robby's WWII Russian field hat. Sigh. I suppose this is an impact of having an older brother. 

Today is Silly Sock day. We spent the morning gluing googly eyes and using glitter glue all over an old pair of Scott's socks. I suppose I should be happy that they are not military themed.

Slippy Leg

 Losing weight is great, but when you are an amputee shedding pounds isn't as easy as pulling out my skinny pants. When an amputee loses or gains approximately 10 pounds, the fit of the socket becomes compromised. Hobbling around with a floppy leg is not fun. It feels as if the universe is laughing at the irony.

Over the past few days I have begun to struggle more with socket fit. I'm lucky that I have gone so long before my fit was completely compromised. I don't enjoy the prosthetic process, but I do not want another summer with an ill-fitting leg. When the temperatures heat up, I know that my leg is going to slip right off if I don't address it now. I suppose there is no time like the present to get started.  

This is our last week of school, or at least it is for Scott and Timmy, so the summertime anticipation is growing. (Robby has a few more weeks left. His end date is dependent upon how hard he works in the next few days.) Scott is looking forward to sleeping in and avoiding as many snarky teens as possible while Timmy is already chatting and dreaming about Cousin Crew adventures. 

I suppose I'd better start planning!

Rocking at the Park

 I had a nice birthday. Despite my feeling non-celebratory, the boys made my day feel special. Next year I turn 50 so perhaps that explains why I was content to just pass this one over. I am already dreading 50 but I have 12 months to pretend that it isn't happening. I am not going to waste 49 fretting over what comes next!

On Saturday we packed up and headed to the park. Robby's band was performing and (thankfully) the weather was delightful. Despite his not enjoying the outdoor venue, he did a fantastic job. (Apparently the stage was unstable and the generators caused some chaos behind the scenes, both impacting his ability to completely relax and rock out.)

In exactly one year we plan to put our house on the market, which means that I have 12 months to get this place in shape for showings. Looking around, I know it is going to be a massive project. I've decided to utilize the next year wisely. Every week I plan to gather at least one box for donation and one bag of trash. If I do the minimum every week, I will have purged at least 52 boxes/bags of 'stuff' from the house before we get serious about selling. I think Future Peggy will appreciate these efforts so I spent Sunday putting my plan into action. 

I cleaned out  the living room, accumulating two boxes for donation and three bags of trash. It feels good to be proactive. Hopefully I can keep this going!

 

Birthday

 Happy Birthday to me!

This year my birthday enthusiasm is low. I would prefer to simply forget my birthday, but since that won't stop time I suppose I have no choice but to acknowledge it. This is my last year in my 40s and I do not like to be reminded that next year I am going to be 50. But I'm not there yet!

Today's birthday plans include working, overseeing schoolwork and chauffeuring the boys to class. I suppose my mundane itinerary reflects my feelings about turning 49. I simply don't care.

This weekend Robby has his band performance. Hopefully the weather holds out because they are playing at our local park. It will be a great afternoon if the weather holds out. Fingers crossed! They all worked too hard to be washed out by weather.  

Have a great weekend.

Clown foot

 Although she continues to struggle with pain and mobility, my Mom is progressing. After weeks of upheaval and angst I feel like my life is returning to normal. Of course, school ends in two weeks and then the summer stresses arrive. Alas, I'll let future Peggy worry about that. I'm just going to enjoy the normalcy of today.

The past few months have been stressful and have taken a toll on me. Since my brother's amputation in September and Timmy starting a new school, I feel like I have been living my life in triage. When I am stressed I eat. But when I'm frazzled, I tend to become nauseated. Since September, I have lost 50 pounds without an effort. 

I'm not complaining about the weight loss. There is no doubt that the 'frazzled diet' is effective, but I don't think it is an accomplishment worthy of celebration. I find the inability to enjoy food extraordinarily frustrating. I am not at the point of writing myself notes as a reminder to eat meals. Now that is a sentence I never thought I'd have to write!

Weight loss as an amputee introduces a host of issues. Primarily is socket fit. I am now suffering from what Robby has dubbed "clown foot syndrome" because my socket is too big and it now farts and flops around when I walk. I'm back to playing the padding game, trying to maintain suction without pressing against nerves and causing pain. 

Sigh. I'm going to have to start the process for a new leg. I hate the prosthetic process, but I dislike being uncomfortable more. 

Mother's Day

 I had a wonderful Mother's Day weekend. This year the boys went all out, showering me with love throughout the weekend and reminding me that I am appreciated and valued. After a chaotic few weeks, it was a wonderful few days of relaxing and unwinding. I am waking up this morning happy, energized and ready to tackle the week.

After spending two weeks in Pennsylvania for my Mom's surgery, I didn't make it up to visit her for Mother's Day this year. She is still in considerable pain and seemed just as happy for the quiet time at home. She is improving but it is not nearly as quick as she had hoped.  Of course, nobody anticipated a total replacement so this recovery has thrown us all off our game.  

Mom has resumed her physical therapy and I am hoping that the movement will help spark more healing. I know that she is anxious to resume her life! I know that she is making incremental progress everyday but, because the improvements are small, the gains are not obvious. I know that she is frustrated and it is difficult to help her because there is little I can actually do except offer support and DoorDash.