I have come to the conclusion that I need to utilize one small, simple word more often. Although only comprised of two letters, refining my ability to say them together will simplify my life and would inevitably save me from hours of head banging frustrations. I am not just very good at saying "No," but I vow to become more adept and comfortable with it!
agree to far too many favors and concessions simply because I have an
aversion to "No." It isn't that I fear hurting somebody's feelings, but
rather at times it is just simpler to agree and follow through with
something instead of holding my ground. Unfortunately, it is only easier
in the moment, and I spend every moment invested in the undesirable
activity lamenting my participation.
My schedule has been upset
and redone more times than I can count because I haven't been able to
speak up. Whether it be agreeing to a last minute visit or helping a
friend with a yard sale, I always seem to be the one who has to
rearrange her plans. I become frustrated with myself for agreeing and
the requester for asking. Simply put, I am tired of always missing out
on what I want to do!
I realize that this issue is mine and not
my friends. Many of them seem to have no problem standing their ground
when it comes to previous engagements. I wish I had the same ability to
deny somebody something because it wasn't convenient for me.
Unfortunately, I have a horrible track record of putting the needs and
desires of others above myself.
As I am getting older, I am
beginning to prioritize myself. I am not feeling as guilty about taking
time for myself, and I have been working to release some of my
self-imposed pressures. I look at people around me and none of them seem
to have an issue saying no. It isn't a bad word, and I should be able
to employ it without guilt. I don't mind helping out and I'm always
willing to lend a hand, but I do mind being a doormat. To add insult to
my frustrations, nobody is at fault but me!
I have a lengthy and
well formed track record when it comes to agreeing. I know that I'm not
going to be comfortable saying no for a long time, if comfort is even
attainable. But for my own sanity, I have to try.