Boxing Invitation

When I picked up Robby from school yesterday, I immediately knew that something was wrong.  Typically slow to gather his belongings, he practically took my hand and ran out the door when I arrived. Once he buckled himself into the car seat the tears began to flow.

"Momom, I had the most horriblest day ever. Joshua beat the snot out of me. I hit him back but only because if I didn't he would have kept whamming me."

Shocked by his statement, I pulled the car over and turned off the ignition.  I pushed the toys, papers and assorted junk which accumulates in the back seat to the floor and sat next to him. Slowly, he began to explain what happened.

Apparently Robby was invited to "play box" with a boy in his class. When Robby told him that he wanted to look for gold instead (he has become quite the little prospector and is convinced he is going to strike it rich) the classmate pushed him on the shoulder. The situation escalated and resulted in Robby being pushed, kicked, elbowed and slapped. 

Robby fully admits that he fought back, and we praised him for defending himself. I don't want to raise a child who becomes a punching bag, but I also don't want to raise a little bully. While I don't condone violence, I realize that he will encounter situations where self-defense might be necessary. I just didn't think that it would happen at his young age!

By the time we finally arrived home, Robby was feeling better. He has a few bruises but those will heal--probably faster than the memories of the incident. After a lengthy family discussion, we formulated a plan.

Robby knows that should he be "invited"  to box again, he is to immediately walk away and play within close proximity to his teacher. If the harassment continues or if the child throws balls at him (like he did yesterday when Robby tried to flee),  he is to inform his teacher. This morning I will speak privately with the teacher and her assistant to relay the incident and to recap our discussion with Robby. 

I'm hoping that this is an isolated incident that simply escalated. The thought of Robby being physically hurt or afraid is almost unbearable. Although I plan on remaining polite and professional, I want to convey our expectations to the school staff. I realize that children fight, but Robby needs to feel safe at school.