Happiness

 While I was sad to say goodbye to Robby, seeing the smile on his photos from New Orleans is all the confirmation I need to know that he is where he needs to be. He spent yesterday making new friends and exploring the museum. Today he flies to Paris to begin his big Normandy adventure. I think I'm probably as excited as him!

Much to my mother's delight, her electric was restored earlier than anticipated. My sister called her around lunchtime to convey the good news. I thought that my mom might want to hang around for another day or so to allow the swamp air to clear out of her home, but she was up and packing almost as soon as I hung up the phone. I know that she enjoyed the visit, but ultimately her desire to reunite with her dog and her cat made the decision to return home easy.

I know my mom was happy to return to her own bed and her animals, but I did enjoy having her visit. She doesn't like to travel and stay away from her own bed, so overnight visits are extremely rare. I hope that she will come more often because we all enjoyed her visiting. Alas, I fear her puppy will always win that battle. :)

 

 

He's Off!

 As soon as he landed in New Orleans Robby's excitement surpassed his anxiety. He checked in with the program organizers before heading to his favorite pizza place near the museum. In the evening he was already hanging out with his roommate and a few new friends, exploring Bourbon Street and having an amazing time. 

I don't think I need to worry about Robby feeling lonely on this trip. Although not naturally an extrovert, when he makes a decision to be sociable he is charming and gravitating. He sent me a text before his plane took-off, vowing to be 'sociable Robert' and he is living up to his promise.

While Robby was en route to Louisiana, Scott and I were heading to PA to pick up my Mom. She lost power on July 4th. Although she was a trooper in the dark, humid heat, having her wait for an anticipated repair date of July 8 at 11 PM felt nonsensical. We have air conditioning, lots of room and a kiddo delighted with a Nana sleepover. It took more coaxing than I care to admit to convince her to come down, but I'm delighted that she is here.

 

Departing!

 It is a momentous day in our home. This morning Robby is embarking on his incredible adventure with Normandy Academy through the National WWII Museum. Attending Normandy Academy became a goal when he learned about the program four years ago. Since that time he has applied annually for the opportunity. After a lot of hard work, this is his year and today he heads to New Orleans.

The past weekend was spent helping Robby get packed and organized for his adventure. (This is his first time traveling internationally without a parent and he is a tad nervous.) Finally, after multiple trips to the store for 'final' items, the suitcase was zipped up yesterday afternoon around 4.  I hugged Scott and Robby goodbye and the pair headed to DC for the night in anticipation of an early morning departure.

I was more excited than sad when I was hugging Robby goodbye. I am so incredibly excited for the experiences that he is going to have that my missing him is completely inconsequential. I cannot wait for him to come home and relay everything he did, but I am looking forward to text messages and photos throughout the trip. 

While Robby is away, I'm going to be able to focus exclusively on Timmy. After hugging Robby and his Dad goodbye, he and I headed to Red Robin for a fun dinner. When we returned home he rode his bike in the rain and through mud puddles, delighting that his 'dirt time' is finally living up to its name. 

 

 

Hot Hot Hot- But I'm not Weak

 Per tradition, it seems that our annual pilgrimage to Ohio always occurs during an intense heatwave. This year was no exception. With temperatures in the triple digits, we were all melting. It was a delightful visit, but I certainly wish we would visit when it was cooler. 

As an amputee, the heat is difficult for me to tolerate. Contrary to popular opinion, this is not because I am of a weaker disposition or because I am prone to complaining more. When a limb is amputated, the ability for the body to regulate temperature is disrupted. My body does not cool as efficiently.

Research has proven that below-knee amputees expend an average of 20% more effort to simply walk than our biped peers. So yes, my body is actually working harder to move around the house even if I make it look easy. In these temperatures, every movement is impactful.

My leg is swaddled in silicone and confined inside a black, carbon fiber socket. Airflow is nonexistent. If I were to lay out with my prosthesis on, my leg would experience burns without seeing the light of day. 

Heatwaves are miserable, but they are worse when you have a disability. If you are struggling, be kind to yourself and rest. Intolerance to this heat is not a sign of weakness, but is rather a result of battles forged. We are stronger than people realize, even if we do melt in the heat.

 Don't forget to drink water! 

Hot

 Greetings from a sweltering Ohio. 

It's hot.  I'm surviving.  We will be home in a few hours. 

Harry

 We had an exciting morning in our household yesterday. Scott was outside and spotted 'Harry,' the 5 foot blacksnake that lives under my concrete porch, slithering outside his hole. We have been desperately trying to catch and relocate Harry since we discovered him earlier this Spring. I didn't want to kill or harm him, but we have been trying to serve his eviction notice for weeks.

For the past few weeks, Harry retreated back into his hole whenever we noticed each other. Yesterday he was basking in the sun and we were finally able to catch him off guard. Despite the snake's size, Scott and Robby wrangled him into a bag without incident. They popped him into a pillow case and took off to relocate Harry to his new mountainous home, about 5 miles away from here.

With Harry evicted, we set about sealing up the holes. I'm a tad concerned that there may be more than one snake under the patio, but my concerns about sealing them into the house was quickly dismissed. Hopefully they are right! 

Schoolroom!

 Timmy's school room has undergone a three-day transformation. During the process I lugged out a total of three contractor sized bags of trash and debris. More importantly and just as surprising, I uncovered household items I have long attributed to being gone. Apparently, Timmy's classroom had become the abyss housing all of our lost items. 

I'm frustrated with him, with Scott and with myself for allowing his room to go into such a state of disrepair. I recognize all of the factors that led to the situation, but in the end they are all excuses. Timmy should have been more responsible with his space, and Scott and I should not have trusted him when he came down with a half a bag of trash and a few dishes before pronouncing it clean. 

This kid has no idea the levels of micromanaging that are in store for him next year!

Once I put my ire to the side, I set to work cleaning and organizing the classroom. The trash was easy to remove because I adopted a modified shovel technique. The task took longer because Robby and I became distracted setting up the display desk to hold his prized artifacts. Somehow, the classroom is now doubling as a museum, but both boys feel that is appropriate so I am going to go with it. During our little side quest, we managed to empty another 7 boxes that were stowed under his bed and in the garage. (It is nice to be almost completely unpacked.) 

I am too ashamed to share the before photo, but I am happy to unveil the newly modified Museum Schoolroom (with the curtains still to be changed).

 

Chickens

 I had planned to spend yesterday cleaning Timmy's school room, but when I discovered a deal on whole chickens at a store near my Mom, we made the decision to pivot. Unfortunately, Scott and I were not the only one lured by the prospect of cheap chicken because they store announced that they were sold out 5 minutes before we arrived. We drove two hours only to miss out by 5 minutes. Talk about frustrating!

We missed out on poultry, but we were able to stop by and have a quick lunch with my Mom so the day was not a complete wash. I wish we would have been able to stay to visit longer but the threat of storms was looming and we wanted to race them home. We pulled into our driveway as the first few raindrops began to fall so our timing was impeccable.

Alas, today it is raining again and there are no chicken sales to distract me from my task at hand. Ready or not, Timmy's school room will be transformed by the end of the day.  Wish me luck! 

Father's Day Wrap-Up

 What a gorgeous Father's Day weekend! While we did not do anything grand to celebrate, we spent oodles of hours outside riding bikes and working (playing) in our little garden. While we avoided presents and activities around other people, both of which were requested by Scott, I did make one of his favorite dinners and baked a Swiss Roll cake for dessert. All in, Scott thoroughly enjoyed his special weekend and everybody is happy.

I'm grateful that we spent so much time outside over the weekend, because storms are rolling through our area this afternoon which will force us inside for several days. I'm going to use the time to finish cleaning Timmy's school room, which looks a tornado landing zone. Once his room is clean, our summertime reset will be complete and the house would have been completely deep cleaned for the season. (Because the room is in the corner, I opted to just close the door until the weather cooperated again.)

I am repulsed by the condition of his school room, and I feel ashamed that Scott and I let it get this bad. I should have been checking in on the room condition on a regular basis. Only after I saw the room did I realize how much I actively avoided the stairs at home after working all day. After walking 15,000+ steps every day at work, I often came home with barely enough energy to make dinner. I certainly didn't have the motivation to climb yet another flight of stairs to survey condition. Obviously we should have been monitoring more closely and will come up with a better plan for next year.  

In the meantime, I'm off to clean! 

Have a great day! 

Never Ossur, Never ForMotion

 I feel like I made a lot of progress towards unwinding and dissolving the end of the school year anxieties that have been impeding my ability to completely relax. Yesterday, because of the rain and cooler temperatures, we stayed home and watched movies most of the afternoon. I know that I have made strides because I didn't even feel guilty for being unproductive! 

Next week I need to start the process to secure a new prosthesis, but that is a hill I can begin to climb in a few days. While I know that it won't be physically painful, I am already frustrated with the process because I don't have a starting point. For the first time since I became an amputee, I don't have a prosthetist. 

I hate the fact that I cannot return to my former prosthetic facility but I refuse to financially support ForMotion, owned by Ossur. After years of dedicated service, the company leadership did not do right by me and the transgressions were unforgivable. My eyes were opened to the corporate greed and the total lack of concerns for the true betterment of patients. I'm hoping to find a facility that it is not overtly profits over patients.

Do you have any leads for a good facility?  Hit me up! 

Plants

 The past few days have been laid back, relaxed and fun. I spent Tuesday afternoon planting the rest of our vegetable garden (yes, I realize we are late but it has been chilly) and re-potting my houseplants. While I don't typically love gardening, I do like working the soil once or twice a year (provided I am wearing gloves). I thoroughly enjoy tending to my houseplants, I just feel an aversion when it comes to messing with dirt. 

Yesterday we decided to switch things up and we went to a local pedestrian mall to stroll and grab lunch at our favorite Mexican restaurant. It was fun to just be outside doing something different, and the pedestrian mall is one of the boys' favorite spots. Although it wasn't anything fancy, it was a fun way to spend a few hours.

I'm glad we went outside when we could, because today it is raining and cool. I suspect our summer is going to be riddled with wonky weather. I'm not sure what we will do this afternoon, but I'm sure I'll think of something.

 

Glasses

 After an obscenely hot few days, the temperatures have finally fallen. Yesterday was gorgeous, and today is supposed to be more of the same. It amazes me how my comfort exponentially increases when the temperature goes down. I am definitely not a hot weather girl! 

Yesterday Timmy had his second tumbling class, which is still receiving mixed reviews. While he doesn't love going, he did talk with other kids and was smiling and laughing on the mats. He has a few more sessions before the end of the series, but I suspect that we will not be renewing our tumbling passes. At this point, Hamlet has his eyes on Drone Command Class, which I agree is more to his interests. The drone class doesn't start until August, so he may have been provided with a stay to avoid more classes in July. 

After tumbling class, Scott ran Robby down to the optometrist office to retrieve his new glasses. At the end of the semester he began to complain about some vision straining, so we immediately took him to get evaluated for glasses. As we suspected, he has joined his mother and his father into the community of eye glass wearers. While he is not thrilled with his new eyewear, I think that his improved vision will be a trade off he will learn to embrace.

I plan on working on our little bucket gardens and our yard while the weather is agreeable. Whatever you are doing, I hope you have a good day! 

Hot Friday

 Mother Nature is menopausal. The temperature fluctuations have been wild over the past few days. On Monday we were wearing sweatpants and turned on the fireplace to get rid of the chill in the room. Yesterday the temperatures were over 100 with swamp-like humidity. Today we are in for more heat which makes me grateful that our air conditioner was repaired.

While the humidity and heat has me miserable, they combined impact has forced me to relax without guilt. I've been struggling to unwind, constantly needing to be productive. In these temperatures, the dog doesn't even want to move so why should I? Yesterday I stayed on the couch for the majority of the day and streamed a series.

Today I'll be ditching the boys and heading to visit my mom for the night. It has been awhile since I've been able to visit her and I'm looking forward to the getaway. Stay cool and have a great weekend! 

Cleaning

 The past few days have been rainy and humid, forcing us inside for most of the daytime hours. There have been breaks in the humidity during the evening, when Timmy lathers on the bug spray and takes off on his dirt bike. He has been tooling and zipping through the yard every night from about 7-9:30, just having a blast. 

When he hasn't been on his dirt bike, he has been inside helping us clean and reorganize the house. With one more room to go, the house has undergone a deep clean and full purge. We have been living here for 18 months and we now have a handle of how we want the house to flow. The past few days have been spent undergoing complete room reorganizations. It's been a lot of work, but I'm so happy with the results. Today we have one more room to tackle: the school room. Wish me luck, because this task is feeling enormous. I know that once I get started it won't be as formidable as it feels, but my goodness I have lost my motivation.  

When I wasn't actively involved in the room cleaning, I was working on getting the 3d printers up and running again. This has been a task that I have been dreading because I knew that we were dealing with hardware issues before the move. I had to swap out parts and make diagnostic fixes, but the boys are delighted to share that they are now operational and that FlexyFriends is again producing.  Of course, I need to find a place because the kitchen counters is not suitable for Flexy production.   

Tumbling

 Yesterday was the first official day of our summer vacation. Much to Hamlet's chagrin, we started our vacation by having him participate in his first tumbling class. With the school routine on hiatus, Scott and I both recognized the need to get Timmy out of the house and around other people. We presented him with a list of options, and he chose tumbling. 

While he loved his tumbling camps from a few summers ago, too much time had passed and he had forgotten his positive experiences. As the time for his class ticked closer, Timmy became increasingly anxious about going to the class. I get it. Going to new places with people whom you don't know is hard. Because of his anxiety, we all went to his class to cheer him on. 

After he took to the mats, it took about 2 minutes before I saw the glimpse of a smile. While I wouldn't say that he emerged with the same enthusiasm that we witnessed with the camp, he had a good time. Hopefully it won't be a struggle to get him to return next week. 

With the tumbling class out of the way, today we have a summer day with nothing on the schedule. I know that I should find this comforting, but I can already feel my anxiety starting to rise. I have to figure out a project soon!

 

Memories

 We are all officially on summer vacation!

On Friday Timmy celebrated his final day of school with a virtual party and an in-person smorgasbord of all of his favorite treats. At 3:30 promptly Scott and I fired up the Bluetooth speakers and gleefully serenaded Timmy with a rousing rendition of "Schools Out for Summer."  Unfortunately, we later learned that he had not yet logged off, so it turns out that his class listened to our rendition before closing the term. 

Saturday morning Scott and I put on our funeral clothes and headed back to Northern Virginia for a Celebration of Life. A co-worker's son passed away. Because Scott and I have both worked with her and have remained connected via Facebook, we wanted to go to extend our support. I suppose the scant attendance at my brother's funeral continues to sway my decisions. If I am able to attend, we are going to go.

It was weird being back in our old stomping grounds. While we were so excited to leave for our next adventure, the area holds so many memories for our family. I lived in Virginia for 25 years, longer than I have lived anywhere else. Virginia is where I met Scott and where we became a family. Driving to the funeral, I was flooded with memories of both the extraordinary and the mundane events of our lives. Each store, stop light and park seemed to flick open another memory portal to our past. By the time we arrived at the funeral I was feeling both overwhelmed and horribly depressed.  

We just don't have those connections in our new home. I know that these types of memories are formed through time, and that we need to be patient. After 18 months, we still feel like strangers in the area. I am still struggling to find friends, and we are so lonely. We miss Virginia, but we also know that we cannot go back. 

 

Last Day

 Happy Last Day of School to Timmy!! 

I honestly do not know who will be more excited to put this school year on a shelf- Hamlet or me. He has been eagerly counting down for the past month, excited about sleeping in and enjoying extended play dates with his friends. I am simply looking forward to the absence of the pressure that becomes part of your life when school is in session. 

This school year has been one of change and growth for Timmy. Because his former school closed, his teachers were forced to pivot and develop their own private venture. I am eternally grateful for the dedication and the hard work that they have invested into their school and students. While the platforms were different and took some adjustment, this year there were no tears as we learned to navigate the programs.

As soon as Timmy became settled into his school year I began working full-time outside the home. This put Timmy in a position of navigating instructional and lunch time by himself. He stepped into his new independence like a champion and has grown exponentially through the experience. I am so very proud of him. 

As of 3:30 this afternoon, the Chenoweth's will be on vacation! 

 

Summer Blues

 I've been frustrated by my inability to unwind and relax. My mind is still in 'school' mode. When I do find myself on the couch relaxing, I feel wafts of anxiety hinting that I should be productive. I don't remember unwinding into summer break being this difficult! Of course, Timmy is still in school so that may be a factor in my relaxation difficulties.

The weather is certainly not bringing any summer vibes. It has been cool (highs at 75) and breezy every day. Today is the first day we are going to break into the 80s. While I have been grateful for the cooler temps because my body and leg are considerably more comfortable, it has been difficult to feel summery when wearing jeans and long sleeve shirts. Hopefully the warmer temperatures will blast the summer blues away, because I am longing to feel carefree with sun kissed cheeks. 

Today is 'camp out' day at Timmy's school. To surprise him, we are going to light to fire pit and roast hot dogs and s'mores for lunch. I think he will be delighted that we are staying on theme, and I'm looking forward to doing something summery. 

 

Lounging

 Yesterday was my first day of summer vacation. While I had high expectations for productivity when I awoke, my motivation quickly waned through the day. I found myself settling into the lounger and grabbing for the remote after I poured my second cup of coffee and, although I moved to prepare meals and help the boys, I didn't really do anything of consequence. I certainly did not tackle my highly organized Summer To-Do 2026 list.

After the chaos of the past few years, I am giving myself permission to relax and lounge this week. Timmy is still in school so his needs are relatively few. I have the luxury of lounging, and it would be a travesty to squander it.  My list will be put on hold, because this week is going to be reserved for sleeping, watching movies and reading my books.

What are you doing today? 

Happy Birthday Koopa!!

 Happy Summer!!

Friday morning I attended my final meeting before I headed to turn in my badge and supplies. It has been an amazing year of growth, not only for my students but for me as well. Timmy, whom I thought would dislike navigating lunchtime by himself, has matured so much that he now loves the autonomy and independence that my working outside the home affords him.  Talk about change!

Alas, all good things much come to an end, and the contract position is now over. I'm optimistic that it will be renewed for next year, but at this time nothing definitive has been offered or decided. Fingers crossed. In the meantime, I'm going to do my very best to enjoy summer vacation with my family.

While Friday Scott and I celebrated the end of the school year, Saturday was all about Robby because my sweet little Koopa turned 20! I can't believe that I have been lucky enough to be his Momom for two decades. Thinking about the passage of time made me feel overwhelmed, so I opted to just stay in the moment. We went to Waffle House for breakfast before heading to the Apple Store (an hour away). We picked up his favorite chicken for lunch before heading to Olive Garden for a celebratory dinner.  Basically, he ate his way through his big day.   

   

Sparkly

 All year I have worn pants. My wardrobe choice was carefully selected because my job is physical (I am literally walking all day) and because I wanted to keep my prosthesis concealed. Anybody who has known me for a nanosecond knows that I am not ashamed of my prosthesis. While I am not ashamed, I am very aware of the disability bias that surrounds amputees and their abilities.

In my experiences, especially in professional environments not geared for individuals with limb loss, being 'out' too soon with a disability is detrimental. Co-workers often start their own little informal evaluations on their new disabled peer, "just to make sure that everything stays okay."  I was not interested in having to work while continuing to prove my worth after I was hired, so I chose to simply wear long pants and do a stellar job all year with my students. 

The school year is over. I looked back on the progress made by all of my students and I feel nothing but pride. Each one of my kiddos made amazing strides towards independent travel. I worked the entire year without encountering any issues because of my amputation and prosthesis. I no longer feel the need to hide because I'm damn proud of what this amputee mommy accomplished over the past 9 months. 

Today, as I go into my final days of work, I'm feeling sparkly.

 

Orientation and Mobility Job

 Memorial Day has come and gone. The constant cold rain did nothing to herald the summer season. I cannot remember another Memorial Day weekend where we huddled in front of the fire and made a pot roast instead of burgers on the grill. We didn't do anything celebratory, but all local activities were cancelled due to the rain so I suppose we didn't really miss out. 

Today is back to work for the final week. I don't know what I will be doing next year, which feels unsettling. It also leaves me feeling frustrated, because I feel like I am fighting for professionalism-again.  Unanswered emails and the total lack of information has forced me to expand my job search beyond my current county. My contract ends on Thursday and I would love to have something established for the next school year.

While I hate to admit it, I'm back on the prowl for a new job. 

After Springsteen

 While Sheri and I had a fabulous time at the concert, the evening ended on a somber note. Because we were had floor seats, it was extremely easy for us to exit the venue. We were among the first wave of concert goers to exit into the fresh air. My sister was about two people ahead of me in the crowd when I saw a woman get bumped and tumbled into a light pillar. She screamed in pain, which prompted me to immediately stop. 

I turned around and I saw her trying to get off the ground. I asked if she was okay, expecting the obligatory "No, I'm fine, thanks" before continuing the walk back to the hotel. Instead, she looked me with panicked eyes and said, "Yes. Please call 911. He is hurting me."

 Sh*t.  I hate confrontation, but I quickly realized that our night was going to get interesting. I screamed to my sister, "Sheri, this woman is hurt and needs help." She immediately came back, which was a blessing because this tall, bald, large drunk man was screaming at the bloodied woman and grabbing at her keys. 

She told him to leave. He wouldn't. I told him to leave. He wouldn't. Sheri told him to leave. The situation was quickly escalating. Despite the blood and the screaming, thousands of people streamed by us without offering to help. I think Sheri and I simultaneously realized we needed to figure this out together. 

With communication that comes from being sisters for life, I left to find the police while she led the lady to safety. The drunk man followed my sister and the lady back into the venue, screaming and demanding that she come back and that everything was fine. 

I'll be honest, it took me longer to locate security than it should have. And when I did find help, it took longer for me to convince them that they were needed than it should have. Regardless, when it was finally understood that they had a violent man stalking a woman outside of their bathroom, the cops converged.  

It turns out that the drunk dude was on probation, so he was quickly led away in cuffs (screaming obscenities.)  The woman was treated by medical and helped by the police. Sheri and I provided our contact information and our accounts of the incident before heading back towards our hotel.  

By the time everything was over, the venue had emptied and we had a relatively quiet walk back to the hotel.   While I'm glad that we were there to help, I'm dismayed that nobody else stepped up.  It makes me very sad.

Springsteen

 The Bruce Springsteen concert is one that I will never forget. 

My sister prefers to arrive at event venues with at least an hour to spare. Because I am an easy traveler, I was fine leaving the hotel early so that we could arrive at the concert with "enough time" for her to be able to get a t-shirt. The show started at 7:30 and we had purchased drinks, her t-shirts and found our seats by 6:05. 

We were up in the rafters, taking pictures from our vantage point of the stage and the arena. Needless to say we were excited! As we were getting comfortable for our 90 minute wait for the show, my sister was approached by a lovely young lady. She introduced herself as being with the tour, and offered to move our seats to the floor. 

Are you kidding me? Floor seats for Springsteen? Talk about an amazing opportunity. We gathered our items from our rafter seats and headed to our new floor seats. Wow. Just wow.

 

Celebration

 Happy Birthday to Me!  

This year's celebration, much like everything else, will be different. Usually I don't have anything planned other than preparing a nicer dinner than normal and baking a strawberry shortcake for dessert. This year I actually have fun plans for my birthday! After work I'm heading to Pittsburgh to connect with my sister at the Bruce Springsteen concert. I'm so excited!

I can't remember the last time I had true plans on my birthday. I suspect it was back when I was in college and we would collectively go to the bars to celebrate at each opportunity. Since I graduated into adulthood, my birthday celebrations have been held at home (sometimes at a local restaurant with only family) followed by cake at home. I know that I have not spent my birthday in a 'party' type atmosphere in nearly 3 decades, a trend that is both pathetic and in desperate need of being broken.  

I'm really looking forward to unwinding tonight! 

Summer Soon

 The school year is heading into the final countdown. By the end of this week, we will be into the single digits when counting down until summer vacation. I've never been one to countdown days in front of students because not every kiddo is excited about the weeks without school and the structure that it brings. While I keep the countdown private, I am so excited about summer vacation!

Are we doing anything spectacular? Hopefully, although nothing is planned. I would love to take Timmy to the beach for a few days in July, but we are unsure where because the cost of flying is simply too high. So we are looking at Virginia Beach for a few days but that is still tentative. Too much can change, and planning isn't fun with this many variables.

While summer vacation is on the horizon, it is not yet here. Today we are back to work and back to school. It is going to be hot, which means that my day is going to be a lot harder. Hopefully the heat will stay away until I'm done with my final student. 

Ready

 I've come to the conclusion that my body and mind struggle when my schedule fluctuates. Having a random Tuesday off continues to play tricks with my mind calendar. I was hoping that I would settle back into the routine and the rest of the week would flow smoothly. Instead I'm still feeling disjointed and overwhelmingly tired. 

I suppose much of my fatigue stems from the end of the year chaos. It's a crazy time of year in those halls!While teachers are busy packing up their rooms and collecting devices, the kids are nearly bouncing off the walls in anticipation of summer vacation. While I will miss most of my students, I'm ready for a vacation. 

Summer break is on the horizon but it is not yet here. At this point, I'm just waiting for Saturday so that I can try to sleep away this fog I'm living in. 

 

Sweetwater!

 Yesterday was wonky because it was election day in WV, closing all public offices and schools. Scott and I were left with an extremely rare day off in the middle of the week. Wanting to take full advantage of the opportunity, we logged Timmy out of school at noon (with his teacher's permission) and headed to Northern Virginia for lunch. We have all been missing Sweetwater Tavern, a local favorite, and were delighted that fate aligned for a road trip.

The food was as good as we remembered. The bill was considerably higher than our norm because we ordered all of our favorites. It was a fun treat and I'm glad that we went. It feels like it was an amazing kick off to summer vacation, with the glaring exception that everyone except for Robby are still in school for another several weeks.

It is hard getting up this morning and getting my head in the school game.  A solitary day off in the middle of week has messed up my entire schedule! I know that it won't take long to get my footing, but my goodness I do not want to put on real pants this morning.

Have a great day!

 

The Graduate

 After work on Friday I gassed up the car and headed to Indiana Pennsylvania. The drive was long only because I was tired, but I knew that I would be happy for the effort on Saturday morning. With my niece graduating promptly at 8:30 AM I knew that I wanted to tackle the lion share of the drive ahead of time. I pulled into the motel, an unsavory local rendezvous spot outside of town, and barricaded myself inside for the night. I went to bed early and woke up ready to watch my baby niece receive her degree!

 

Graduation

 Yesterday I received a very special invitation. Due to unforeseen circumstances, my niece had several extra tickets for her college graduation. While I understood the need to prioritize attendees when graduation plans were being discussed, I am delighted to be able to witness this amazing milestone in person. Recognizing the importance of my attending, Scott immediately started to find me a hotel room semi-local to the university. I'll be 20 minutes away tomorrow morning, allowing me to relax and actually sleep before the 8:30 start time. 

I am so proud of my niece. She has worked so hard, both academically and literally, throughout her college career. She has already accepted a position as a social worker. I swell with pride when I imagine the families and lives that she will enhance through her efforts.

What a great way to kick off Mother's Day weekend!

Pics tomorrow. 

Mall Cops

 Yesterday I took a student to the mall to practice some of his skills in a real-life environment. I love community mobility days. Being out of the physical schools makes the practice more fun and the time goes quicker. As a bonus, I usually get to enjoy a snack in the food court!

To say that I am proud of my student would be an understatement. Yesterday he navigated through the mall, located the Bath and Body Works, solicited assistance and made his purchases without me. While I was still supervising, he was essentially 100% independent which is an amazing accomplishment. Unfortunately, he may be too comfortable in public.  

While he was in the store I was surrounded by three mall cops. In a chilly tone, I was asked why I was following around a blind individual. "There have been reports that you are suspiciously stalking this individual."  Sigh. Apparently the school employee badge that I was wearing around my neck and the mobility training cane in my hand was not a signal enough that we were on a school trip. 

I was able to quickly justify my role, my student found the exchange hilarious. I was frustrated but I tried to frame the incident in a positive light. At least the community was truly looking out for each other. Somebody was concerned about his safety and spoke up. That isn't a bad thing.  

The fact that they failed to notice the teacher bad is simply moronic, but their intentions were well placed. 

Success

 Yesterday I had an amazing day at work. After working and struggling for months, my student finally crossed a light controlled intersection independently and without tears! Overcoming her own fears about walking independently has been an obstacle that we have been chipping away at throughout the year. I feel like yesterday she knocked a hole through the bolder and sees a glimmer of an independent future. 

Last night I helped Robby enroll in the college course portion of the Normandy Academy experience, allowing him to earn 3 college credits. He spoke with his advisor earlier this Spring about the course and transferring the credits into his program. Robby's advisor seemed to feel that the credits will count towards one of his Historical Preservation courses. Hopefully the Registrar will see his logic and agree to the swap, because right now my Koopa is on Cloud 9 with the prospect of eliminating Architecture from his schedule next semester.

While I was busy helping Robby, Timmy was on the swings or riding his bike through the yard. I love seeing and hearing him playing outside. I feel badly for not recognizing how much he missed his swing set, but I am going to focus on his joy that it is now in place. 

Today will again be busy, but the hours go a little faster when the skies are so bright and the temperatures are perfect. Have a great day! 

HOme

 Robby has officially finished his second year in college, marking the 50% point in his collegiate career. Wow! On Friday afternoon Scott and I converged at Robby's dorm after work to finish the move-out. Because I have been harping on him to bring home non-essential items for weeks, the final move-out was easy (relatively). Unfortunately the contents of his dorm room are now strewn across my living room floor, but we will tackle that issue throughout the week.

Saturday we honored Scott's one year anniversary since his heart attack. The anniversary hit him hard and the boys and I struggled to bring a smile to his face throughout the day. He just wanted to be left alone, which is ultimately what we ended up doing. First anniversaries are difficult, regardless of the progress that has been made during the year.

On Sunday I began to tackle the mountain of laundry that was brought home from college. From clothes to linens, the piles feel endless! In the evening we lit up the fire pit to celebrate Robby's start to summer vacation. 

 

Fun

 Yesterday's PLP subsided by mid morning, allowing me to thoroughly enjoy the rest of my day. Timmy offered to let me borrow some of his meteorites and other space rocks so that I could show them to my students. My goodness, I under estimated the excitement that would be elicited by every single student when I asked them if they wanted to hold a piece of Mars. From preschool to high school, each student eagerly grasped the opportunity and thoroughly enjoyed exploring the different items. It was a fun day full of smiles and excitement.

Today the excitement will continue as Robby is moving home after the successful completion of his Sophomore year. I can't believe that he is 1/2 of the way through with his degree! This semester he has really come into his own. Although I know he is going to miss his college lifestyle, I am looking forward to having him home.

As a family, we opted to handle the move-out differently this year. Robby has a lot of anxiety involving move-out because last year it ultimately led to Scott's heart attack. In order to minimize the amount of effort needed on a single day, we have spent the past few weeks and days ferrying boxes and bags from the dorm to home. Today we only have to move bedding, his laptop, refrigerator and microwave. It *should* be easy!

Wish us luck! 

PLP

My not-so-phantom pain has decided to make an unannounced visit and it appears that she has settled in to stay for awhile. My bouts of plp are short compared to some of my friends who suffer horribly and constantly, so I really try to not complain when I have a flare. But I also recognize that my flares still cause me pain and my discomfort shouldn't be minimized through comparison. I am lucky that I don't flare often, but I am miserable when it occurs.

I'm hoping that the pain will work out as I go through my day. Unfortunately today is going to be very busy as I typically log the most steps on Thursdays. The constant twitching through my limb is driving me crazy and it is only 7 AM. UGH! Sometimes being an amputee really sucks, and today is one of those days. 

Wish me luck and hope that the pain walks itself out. 

Done In Due Course

 Yesterday was rough. I had been dreading the day for several weeks because I knew that the meetings scheduled were going to be both long and tenuous. I wasn't incorrect. I walked into the meeting at 10 and didn't leave until nearly 3, working through lunch and all bathroom breaks. By the time I arrived home I had only logged 2k miles on my pedometer, but my body and mind were drained.  

Thankfully today my calendar is meeting light so I get to spend the majority of my time with my students. It is hard to believe that we are entering the final month of the school year. I look at their growth and I am so proud of all of them! It has been an amazing experiencing becoming part of their lives for a few months. 

Have a good day. I'm certainly going to try! 

Birthday Wrap Up

 Timmy thoroughly enjoyed his birthday weekend. Friday morning we kicked off the day by going to Waffle House for breakfast. Because it was a wonky work day, I was able to take him to Hibachi for lunch, which is always an absolute favorite. For dinner he opted to keep it simple by celebrating with cheese fries and chicken tenders from his favorite local pizza restaurant.  For dessert, we had ice cream cake of course!

In between the numerous restaurant visits, Scott and I were able to assemble his gift. Timmy was delighted (although not surprised) to receive his new electric dirt bike. He spent the majority of the afternoon tooling around the house and through the woods on his new bike. 

Saturday we met my Mom and sister for lunch at Red Robin, so the eating out celebration continued. His Nana gifted him protective equipment for his new bike, which is both needed and much appreciated. As soon as the rain subsided after we got home Timmy geared up and headed back on his bike.

Yesterday Timmy rode and played on his swing for the majority of the afternoon while I cooked a week's worth of meals. Although it is a lot of effort and I am usually exhausted by the end of the day, I have learned to appreciate my efforts after a long day at work. This week is going to be both busy and stressful. Hopefully it will be a good one!

Happy Birthday Timmy!!

 Today is one of my favorite days of the year because it is the day I became a Momom for the second time.  Happy Birthday to my sweet, mischievous, precocious, kind, curious and funny Timmy (aka Hamlet).  I can't believe I am waking up this morning as the Mom of a preteen. I am excited (and somewhat intimidated) by the adventures that lie ahead for my little Hamlet. 

Timmy seems to find situations that are always interesting, unexpected and fodder for conversations, probably because he loves to make people laugh. He is my little performing comedian. Sometimes, when he is in the middle of one of his joke bits, I can see him in the future on a stage or being interviewed. After he makes it bit, I fully expect him to apologize in a public forum for the chaos that he brought into his mother's life when he was a young child trying to perfect his craft.  :)

Happy Birthday Hamlet. I love you to the moon and back, and being your Mom is one of my greatest achievements. You drive me crazy and you frustrate me to tears, but you also melt my heart and make me laugh more than anybody else.  I love you! 

 

Coffee

 It is difficult to fathom that tomorrow morning I will be the Momom to a 12 year old! At the same time, the aches and popping that my body experiences each morning reminds me of my age, so I really shouldn't be surprised by the passage of time. Regardless, the next few days are all about Timmy and I'm ready to celebrate.

To say that he is excited about his birthday would be an understatement. He has been counting down for over a month while dropping not-so-subtle hints about coveting an electric dirt bike.  I'm not going to drop any spoilers, but I suspect that he will be delighted with his birthday. At least, that is our goal.

 Even though his birthday isn't until tomorrow, our family has been in celebration mode for a few days. Each morning I have been surprising Timmy with a favorite breakfast as we countdown to Friday. Each evening he has been happily swinging on his new swing set in the backyard, delighted with his new set up. 

Today is going to be busy. My schedule is packed and I am going to all of my energy to get through the day.  My energy and probably a few more cups of coffee.  Have a great day! 

Temperatures

These wild temperature fluctuations are crazy!  Last week I was melting in the 90s, while this morning I'm bundled up under blankets and cursing the fact that I have already stowed my gloves for the season. I know that I am in the majority, but right now I prefer the cooler temperatures. My leg fit is more consistently comfortable when I do not add sweat to the mix. 

I only have five more weeks left in this school year. Do you think my leg will make it until the end of the term? My the odds be in my favor.  LOL

 

Swinging

 Scott and I spent Saturday morning assembling a 10-foot high swing set, courtesy of Timmy's Nana. My mother has an established history of gifting extraordinarily heavy items to my boys, so when a 250 lb box showed up on my driveway, I didn't need to look for a card. Timmy has been patiently waiting for his swing set to be assembled, and Saturday morning was the perfect day. 

With temperatures in the low 70s and no rain for the day, Scott and I set out to take full advantage of the assembly opportunity. Did we have to redo every step at least once because we made a mistake? Absolutely. Despite our best efforts, we were constantly disassembling and redoing steps. Even with our frustratingly frequent mistakes, assembly did not take as long as we feared. 

After 2 hours, the swing set was done and ready to be placed in the yard.  Timmy was ecstatic when he saw it in the driveway, and before I knew it he was helping Scott carrying it up the hill. By mid afternoon Timmy was happily swinging. According to him, it is the best thing we have done to the house since we moved in. 

I have to say, I agree.  Thank you Mom!  You knew just what he needed.

 

TGIF

 I'm happy it is Friday!

The week after a break is always difficult. It is harder to wake up in the morning and the days feel slightly longer when you try to resume your pre-vacation schedule. The heat has not helped quell my fatigue. While I appreciate the warmer temperatures, Mother Nature's most recent heat flash has brought temperatures in the 90s. Adjusting to the heat as well as returning to the work schedule has left me completely wiped out.

I already know that I'm going to have a difficult time navigating the heat in this current prosthetic set-up. My leg was slipping out of the socket yesterday and I felt my remaining muscle struggling to hold on with each step. I'm spraying my limb down with antiperspirant this morning in the hopes of calming the sweat reaction, but I know that I am going to need a more aggressive approach. 

This socket simply doesn't fit, and my system of make-shift pads and socks becomes compromised when heat is added to the mix.  I am really hoping that I can hold on until June, when the school year ends and I can start the process for a new leg. 

Happier

 The temperatures are rising and there is no doubt that Spring has sprung. I am loving spending the hours outside with my students, exploring neighborhoods and the school campus. After being indoors throughout the winter, it is nice to be working outside again. The minutes pass so much quicker in the fresh air and sunshine!

As the temperatures are rising, I find myself struggling with my wardrobe. I will not wear shorts to work, but I need to find lighter weight pants or capris. The heavy denim pants that I have been wearing are becoming very hot throughout the day. It is a strange situation because I don't know if I just should stay on trend and keep with longer pants that are lighter in weight, or do I just go with capris and let it known that I'm an amputee.

At this point, only a few select individuals know that I am living with prosthesis. It is kind of fun to be walking with a 'secret,' but perhaps it is time to just reveal and be comfortable. I was initially concerned about being able to make my own impression. The school year is almost done, so I believe that goal has been achieved. Before the end of the month, I will host my own personal celebration of limb loss awareness month by revealing my prosthesis at work. It should be fun! 

In the meantime, we are settling into the end of the school year with our eyes on summer. Robby has two more weeks of classes before finals. The rest of us have work until the end of May and Timmy continues for another week or two beyond that. Before I know it, we will all be home and waking up late on lazy summer mornings! It has been another year of adjustments and I cannot wait to just totally unwind.

 

Better Day

 I'm not going to lie, yesterday was rough. Hopefully today will be better.

Although it was a difficult day, it was an absolutely beautiful evening. Timmy, recognizing that I was upset, took it upon himself to prep the firepit. After it was lit he invited me to come outside to enjoy it because "even the worst days end better when you have a firepit."

He wasn't wrong. There was something soothing about just sitting next to the firepit and letting my mind unwind. I realized that I have been taking unprofessional exchanges personally. In reality, these interactions are simply a reflection of a different professional code of conduct which is probably regionally based.  The rules are supposed to be the same yet I often feel as if I am trying to learn an entirely different game. 

As this contract winds down with the school year I am starting to open myself up to new adventures. I am not sure what I am going to do next school year. The prospect of starting over feels overwhelming but I am reassured by the knowledge that I have already done it several times. 

Here's hoping that today is a better day. Wish me luck as I struggle to keep my face calm and my voice quiet. 

Rough start

 I was told to be clear and concise.

Is "bite me" clear enough?  It's been a rough start to the week.... 

I'm back

 My apologies for not posting last week. Because we were on Spring Break, I wanted to disconnect and just enjoy the time with the family so I opted to avoid the computer. I realize, in retrospect, that I should have posted my intentions. If you are still with me, I thank you!

My week off-line was just what my mind and heart needed to recenter and get ready for the weeks ahead. I spent the beginning of my week off by hanging out with Scott and Timmy (when he wasn't in school).  On Wednesday I headed up to visit my Mom and to accompany her to a doctor's appointment. While I was in PA my very dearest friend made to trip to hang out with me at my Mom's. It was so wonderful to have some friend time! I have missed those types of connections, especially since moving to WV.

Friday afternoon I packed up and headed back home for the remainder of our break. I spent the weekend deep cleaning the house. It hasn't looked this clean since we moved in, but I'm not overly optimistic that it will remain this way. I'm going to try to enjoy it while I can.

Today is back to work for everybody.  It is going to be hot. Wish me luck!

Easter

 Our Easter was uneventful but enjoyable. On Saturday night our yard was 'egged' as part of a local fundraiser.  Timmy (with an obedient Robby in tow) spent an hour running around the yard with flashlights, trying to locate each egg before the rain rolled into the area. Although the egg hunt was supposed to occur during daylight, the nighttime search was perfect fun. I loved hearing Timmy squeal with egg greedy delight with each plastic discovery.

The majority of Sunday was spent in the kitchen, working on a dinner that highlighted a favorite side from each family member. It took me 4.5 hours and three loads of dishes to prepare a meal that took about 20 minutes to consume. After dinner I packed up all the leftovers for Robby and we returned him to his dorm to finish out the school year.

This week I'm off, which brings me so much relief and happiness. My goodness I need a break! I'm looking forward to days of quiet time where I have few to no demands placed upon me.  Hopefully my dreams manifest into reality, because I suspect I'll be working around the house and finishing every project that has been put off. 

Holiday

 Two more days until Spring Break!  My goodness, I'm fairly certain that I am more excited than my students. At this point, the prospect of a solid week without obligations or expectations feels like a luxury vacation. Of course, I'm sure I will fill the time with household tasks and finishing projects that have been waiting, but for the next few days I will continue to dream of relaxation.

While our break is next week, Timmy is enjoying his holiday this week. Yesterday I surprised him by taking him to Red Robin for a late lunch. My goodness that kid loves his cheeseburgers! I feel quasi-guilty about him being home alone all day without the stimulation of his schoolwork, but he has been happy as can be by himself. He has thoroughly enjoyed riding his bike, watching television and eating snacks without supervision, and has been living his best life.  

With today being April 2, I would be remiss if I didn't acknowledge that April is Limb Loss/ Limb Difference Awareness Month. This year the efforts to highlight the issues faced by amputees feels insignificant. Progress is slow and sometimes battles stall. I definitely feel like the limb loss community is floating adrift without a clear direction. In the current political climate, it is difficult to make headway towards true progress.

Although Spring Break is on the horizon, I still have a few days of work left. The next two days will be busy and chaotic, especially because of the added energy of the approaching holiday.  Hopefully I will have the energy to keep up with these kiddos!  

 

 

 

Happy Mask

 I feel like I am teetering on the edge of a frustration meltdown. My emotions have been held so tightly for so long that, instead of healing, I have become a tinderbox ready to blow. Something has got to give, because I don't want to continue living life on the emotional edge. It isn't fun for anybody.

I'm beyond frustrated with my prosthesis. Last night I had to dismantle it (again) to create some makeshift buffers to stop the squeaking. Each time I have to take it apart I feel twangs of emotions that leave me feeling uncomfortable. I am angry that I am in a situation where I am dependent upon the device that isn't functioning properly. I recognize that I could start the process for a new leg, but I also don't have access to endless leave time to accommodate the fittings and appointments. From a practical standpoint, I need to hold steady until summer break. It stinks!

Although it isn't his fault, I find myself increasingly frustrated with the new cardiac lifestyle. There are so many variables to manage, and Scott seems to slip between which he feels is most important. I never really know if he is overly concerned with sodium, fiber or saturated fat. I know that this is new to him and that he is struggling to acclimate, but the changes in dietary focus are leaving me with whiplash. 

I also realized that I'm angry that we are a cardiac family. I know that this isn't anybody's fault and I certainly do not blame Scott for having a heart attack. I am just angry that our family now has to manage these risk factors and medical reality. I want our old carefree lives back, but I know that that life stage is over.  

Today I just want to scream and hide. Fortunately I have to work and my students deserve my best, so I'll have another great excuse to put on a happy mask. Right now, life feels very hard. 

Weekend

 After a week of feeling like I was licking a curb, I finally feel better. My nose is still a little congested, but at least I feel human again. And I recovered right in time, because this past weekend was both busy and eventful.  

Saturday was spent protesting with Robby before going clothes shopping. Rob was invited to a scholarship reception on Sunday and we realized that he had outgrown (again) his suit. While we didn't have time to secure a new suit, we did set him up with a nice pair of Dockers and a new shirt for the event. 

Sunday was dedicated to the scholarship reception. While I may never see my kids receive an Olympic medal or athletic award, I was tickled to be able to accompany my kiddo to the reception. I am always proud of him and his accomplishments, but yesterday I was especially tickled to be his Mom. I'm so proud of how well he is doing in college, and the person he is becoming.

My leg held up to the activity over the weekend, but I know that my time with this prosthesis is wearing down. I am feeling the lack of energy return with every step. As soon as the school year is over, I'm going to start the process for a new leg. I'm dreading it, but I know that it will be worth it in the end.

Do you have any suggestions for a new foot?  And if you know of a prosthetist in WV or NoVA, please let me know!