Swimsuit Confidence

Although Scott and Robby went swimming almost daily last summer, I made it to the pool a total of three times. While they were having fun splashing in the sun, I was inside recovering from my surgeries while trying to take care of Timmy. Needless to say, it was a miserable summer.

This year is different because I am healthy and Timmy is old enough to come to the pool to play in the water. Planning to spend my afternoons at the pool everyday, I decided it was time to get a new swimsuit.  Typically swimsuit shopping is dreaded with the same intensity as my pelvic gyn exam, but this year was different. Perhaps it is because I am 41, or maybe it is because I'm a Mom to two and prefer utility over fashion, but I didn't shed a single tear picking out my swimsuit. 

I quickly chose two swimsuits that both covered my body while allowing me to move and play with my kids. Standing in front of the mirrors, I felt the familiar internal criticism start to build. Instead of bowing to the negativity, I made the decision to change my thought process. 

My husband thinks I'm sexy and my kids just want me to play with them in the pool. Nobody that really matters is judging my body,  so why spend so much time and mental energy trying to impress people whom I do not know. Additionally, and if I were to be completely honest, I've learned that nobody is ever looking at my body when I'm at the pool. All eyes are always drawn to my black carbon fiber prosthetic. I could probably walk around topless and nobody (with the exception of Scott) would notice! For once, the stares are liberating. 

Once I fully embraced my new perspective and stopped the self-critiquing, I felt as if a weight lifted.  We spent the afternoon yesterday at the pool, and I love my new swimsuits. I feel both comfortable and confident. I might have jiggles and softer curves, but none of that matters when I'm playing and having fun with my kids.