Suck It Up Mode

Becoming a bi-ped again is not progressing as quickly as I would prefer, but I am seeing small improvements every day. Last week I yelped and became dizzy when trying to don my liner. Now I can put it on with minimal cussing and no loss of consciousness. I will consider that a move in the right direction.

I would prefer that I was void of all pain, but I also realize that is a lofty wish. The surgery was only four weeks ago, and although it feels like a lifetime I know that my body is still healing. Realistically, I don't expect to be walking unassisted for another month, and it will take longer for the pain to stop reminding me of my surgery with every step. 

I was concerned that Robby had his expectations for my walking set too high. He was so excited when we went to Mr. Elliot's, convinced that I would leave the office walking. I tried to prepare him for the reality of a long recovery, but he was certain that I would be able to do it. 

Obviously, I was not able to walk out of the office unassisted. Undeterred by my crutch use, Robby has been nothing but supportive. My heart melted when he hugged me after my first steps down the hallway. On the drive home, he mentioned that he was a lucky boy.  When I asked him why, he explained that "I'm the only kid on my whole school who gets to help teach their Mom how to walk. That's an important job for me." I don't know what I did to raise a child who has such an optimistic and enthusiastic outlook about life. So many other kids would be frustrated by my limited mobility, but mine sees the situation through an unexpected perspective.

Yesterday morning I slipped into my leg (no easy feat considering both the swelling and soreness of the limb) and joined the boys in going out for breakfast. Using both crutches and putting minimum weight through the leg, I slowly inched my way into the restaurant.  Exhausted and a little embarrassed by my slow walking, I gave a faint smile to the server before slinking into the seat. Robby felt compelled to inform the nice lady about my status.  "Momom just had her leg re-amputated. She is starting to walk with a new leg that Mr. Elliot made her. It is really hard to learn to walk again, and I'll tell you it hurts like hell. Don't worry though, Momom is in suck it up mode. She is in that mode a lot."  The poor teenager didn't know how to respond.  I'm thinking that we need to talk with Robby about providing too much information to people whom we do not know, but I do appreciate his open nature and desire to share.

Despite his verbosity, Robby has become quite a little cheerleader, encouraging me to walk and showering me with praise through every step. I am quite thankful for his encouragement, at times it is the only thing keeping me from throwing the leg out the window. His constant banter when I'm walking, or trying to walk, has made pushing through the pain easier. With his help and encouragement, I am feeling confident that I will be walking again soon.  After all, it is hard to slow down when you have a little boy constantly reminding you to suck it up.