Restricted

Yesterday was definitely not my best day. Both boys seemed to go out of their way to find new and vexing ways to get into trouble. Robby was so snarky and disrespectful on the way to school that he was sentenced to hard labor and the removal of all electronics for the week. I was so upset that his crocodile tears and pleas for mercy held no effect. 

It isn't often that Robby earns a punishment, but when he does we tend to prefer a combination of extra (often unsavory) chores with the removal of all electronic devices. Of course, the fact that he was loaded with chores left little time to actually miss the computer. I'm hoping that coming down both swift and firm will thwart further deviations into the realm of parental disrespect.  I know that he is a preteen and testing the limits, but understanding the normalcy of his behavior does not condone it. Just as he feels compelled to push the boundaries, we have to double down on our rules.  Let's face it, sometimes being a parent isn't fun!

I hate punishing Robby and it is hard, even when I know that it is for his benefit. I really miss my sweet little Koopa. The little boy who used to hold my hand, look up at me with bright brown eyes and proclaim that I was his best buddy has been replaced with an all-knowing and sarcastic preteen.  I am not relishing this change. 

Timmy pushed my buttons on a completely different level. He has been going through the "I don't want to wear clothes" phase, stripping down naked at the every opportunity. Trying to dress him has become a struggle reminiscent of the World Wrestling Federation. He may be little, but my goodness he is strong!

I became so weary of his throwing toys that I dumped my extra blankets out the chest and taped frowny faces all over it. Every time Timmy threw a toy I picked it up and put it into the "naughty box." I am hoping that he quickly figures out that throwing toys results in his losing them. In the meantime, it was certainly easy cleaning up last night because just about everything was conveniently stowed in the chest. 

I'm hoping that today is a better parenting experience because yesterday left me diminished and doubtful. I want to be the nice Mom again, not the stern disciplinarian. While I know that both sides must balance, I really prefer having fun with my kids instead of spending time devising and overseeing punishments.

Valetine's Day Recap

Yesterday we had a nice, albeit low key, Valentine's Day. After our weekend adventure Scott and I struck an agreement for a minimalist holiday this year. I gave him a pound of personalized M&M's and made a nice family dinner.  He surprised me with a bouquet of flowers and did the dishes. At this stage in our relationship, sometimes true romance is expressed through housework and division of family chores.

Robby had a great day at school. He ended up exchanging emoji pillows with a friend "who happens to be a girl but please don't think that she is my girlfriend." It was actually cute because both friends wanted to buy a gift for each other and ended up choosing the exact same.  I topped off the school day by surprising his class with milkshakes, elevating him to hero.

Timmy seemed to enjoy the excitement of the holiday, but he loves most things. I brought him some new Thomas the Train books so he spent the majority of the day hugging them and paging through the pictures. He still won't sit down to listen to me read, but he no longer tries to chew on the books so we are considering that progress!

I hope that everybody had a wonderful Valentine's Day, filled with whatever level of celebration you desired.

Customer Service Success

Although we all had a great time on our mini weekend getaway, I knew that the experience had been tempered because of the limited number of pools available at the water park. He never complained, but I could tell that Robby was disappointed that he couldn't scale the aquatic obstacle course and splash in the wave pools, both experiences that he had been eagerly anticipating since researching the resort on the internet.  Sunday night I sent a quick email to Great Wolf Lodge, conveying our disappointment that the two main pools were closed during our stay. I was expecting a canned response and certainly was not anticipating what happened yesterday.

Yesterday afternoon the manager from the resort called me and offered an apology for the closed pools. While I knew that she was not personally at fault, it was refreshing to have a company respond to feedback and concerns.  I was flabbergasted when she invited our family back to the resort as their guests so that we can have the full experience.  My reasons for reaching out to them were not to obtain anything for free, but merely to convey our disappointment and concerns that both main pools were closed simultaneously. 

It is awesome when a company actually honors its customers. In these days of endless telephone trees and robotic messages, proper customer service has become a rarity that sets a company apart from all others. I appreciate the time that the manager of Great Wolf Lodge took in reaching out and talking with me, and I am excited to accept her offer of another stay. It was certainly not expected, but the gesture is very much appreciated.

Howling Fun!

We had an awesome mini-getaway at Great Wolf Lodge.  While we did run into some frustrations (broken keys, pool closures etc.), we didn't let the inconveniences ruin our time. With the friend drama fresh in everybody's mind, Scott and I were highly cognizant of splitting our attention between Robby and Timmy so that each child could enjoy the activities. Of course that meant that we didn't see each other often, but that was not the purpose of this vacation. This getaway was about having fun with the kids, and we succeeded in our mission.

Timmy loved the splash park and was content playing in the knee deep water. He slid a few times, but seemed particularly taken with the water squirters.  Scott took the lead with Timmy at the Water Park, leaving me to become slide buddy for Rob.  I used to love water slides, but these were fast and reminiscent of roller coasters.  I think I need to pack some Dramamine before our next excursion.

After splishing and splashing for a few hours we went back to our hotel room. Timmy fell sound asleep almost as soon as he was changed into his pajamas. After eating dinner Scott stayed in the room with sleeping Hamlet while Robby and I went off to conquer the Magical Quest.

The game was clever and engaging. We bought a magic wand, and of course we then had to pay for activation for the game (because a resort will always charge you as much as possible.) After we were wanded up, Robby and I began our magical quest. After one hour (and 7,000 steps) we were ready to fight the final boss: the dreaded red dragon.  It was a tight battle, but Robby came up victorious!  We headed to the arcade to celebrate his victory, apparently the celebratory method of all great magicians. 

Yesterday morning we woke up early (thanks to Timmy) and headed out to breakfast. After eating we went back to the pool, where we pretty much repeated everything from the day before. A few hours later we were drenched, exhausted and ready to head home. Timmy promptly fell asleep in the car, smiling in his sleep and awaking about 30 minutes from home. 

We managed to cram a lot of family memories into a 24 hour period. I think the drama of the friend rebuffs faded away as we were able to making spending time with his parents cool. Scott planned an awesome surprise adventure for us! 

Great Wolf Drama

Scott and I have been together for 17 years and we have learned to predict each others movements and reactions. Every once in awhile though, he does something so out of his norm that it takes me off guard. Last weekend was one of those occasions.  For the first time since we met, Scott spontaneously planned an impromptu family getaway. I was flabbergasted when he emailed me the confirmation for Great Wolf Lodge.

I love taking mini family getaways, so much that the onus of planning and scheduling has always fallen on me. This is the first time that he has taken the lead, completely taking the family by surprise with his plans. Robby was delighted both with going to Great Wolf and the invitation to bring a friend along to enjoy the experience.  Without hesitation, he asked if he could bring his cousin. 

I called my sister and asked if his cousin could come with us. While she said yes, I knew that it was only one hurdle for the adventure. I needed to get permission from her father who has custody on the weekends. Negotiating time with the kids during the weekend is difficult, so I knew that it was an uphill battle.  Ever an optimist, I gave it my best shot.

Despite my pleas, we were summarily denied. I say we because his decision impacted not only me, but absolutely devastated Robby. I hate and resent how divorce drama infiltrates into our lives! 

After much discussion, Robby decided to extend the invitation to another friend. The original acceptance was rescinded last night, leaving us back to square one. I have an upset little Koopa who now thinks that he has no friends and that nobody likes him. I'm trying to explain that it is difficult to find somebody who is allowed to travel with another family overnight. Despite my logic, he is feeling deflated and lonely. I can't say that I blame him because I am finding myself feeling many of the same emotions.

Tomorrow we are headed to Great Wolf for the night, an adventure that was lovingly planned by Scott. I am going to do my best to make sure that the disappointments leading up to this adventure don't overshadow the fun. I'm sure that Scott and I will be able to divide our energies between Timmy and Robby so that both boys have a blast.  Wish us luck!

Not Aggressive

It is safe to say that Robby and I hold an equal disdain for sparring week. He hates donning all of the pads and entering the "combat circle." I hate helping him put on all of his pads and watching him in the "combat circle." My little Koopa has so many attributes, but aggression is not one of them.

Despite wearing every pad available, Robby is petrified of being hurt. He also holds a strong aversion towards possibly causing pain on his opponent. While the "combat" at this stage is supposed to be light contact, Robby claims that it is better to be safe than sorry. Therefore, he only attempts to fight back when the instructor stands next to him yelling. All other times he spends the sparring session frantically hopping, dodging, weaving and sometimes blatantly running away from his opponent. 

Yesterday he was paired with a particularly aggressive six year old girl. In Robby's defense she is also scheduled to be tested for her black belt this month, so she is far superior in both skill and experience. This young lass was not lacking in aggression, and took after Robby like a pit bull going after a bone. With her arms and legs in full attack, Robby resorted to just trying to run away from her.  When he found himself pinned against the back wall with no escape, curled up into the fetal position in the corner. 

His instructors, to their credit, tried to encourage Robby to fight back. After he was coaxed out of the corner he assumed his spot on the mat and continued to spar. He made contact a few times, but at this point I'm fairly certain that the little girl was going easy on him. Class seemed to drag on forever, although I'm sure it was longer for him than for me. We went out for a milkshake on the way home, which seemed to soothe some of his frustrations.  Thankfully, we won't have to spar again for a few weeks. Maybe by then he will have more confidence to defend and to fight back.

Forgotten Stares

Yesterday the weather was unseasonably warm. For the beginning of February, 70 degrees feels heavenly. Of course, my boys would prefer snow because they are longing for cancellations and delays. I'm sure that the winter will rear its head soon, but in the meantime I'm thoroughly enjoying the spring temperatures. 

The weather was so warm yesterday that I opted to forgo the jeans for a pair of capris. Timmy happily sprinted to the car when I invited him to go to the park. He was delighted with the opportunity to run around outside, to climb on the structures and slides, and to swing as long as he wished.  He was definitely a happy little guy!

Playing with him at the park, I slowly became aware of the reactions from our fellow park goers. At first I thought that they were looking surprised and stunned because Timmy is so incredibly adorable (yes, I realize that I am biased). When a child ran up to the slide, took one look at me and sprinted in the opposite direction I realized that my cute Hamlet was not garnering the attention. The culprit was me.

After wearing jeans for a few months, I have become accustomed to blending in with the public. I completely forgot that my leg was visible. The looks that I was receiving were because of my prosthesis. Once I figured out the cause, I opted to ignore the glances and continued to play with Timmy.

Over the past few months I had become temporarily normalized while wearing jeans. Yesterday, with the weather allowing me to tap into my spring wardrobe, I failed to prepare mentally for the prosthesis being visible. I was reminded that, unless I purposely conceal my prosthesis, I will always be the recipient of second glances, occasional snickers and gawking stares from strangers.