Pain

 I came home last night absolutely wrecked from work. My Spooky Scavenger Hunt was a success, but I underestimated the number of times I would be running up and down the stairs throughout the day. By the time I finished with my final student, I had climbed 27 flights of stairs. Needless to say, every part of my body was hurting, but my leg was feeling the brunt.

I hobbled around the house before taking it off entirely. My poor limb felt (and looked) like it had been beaten with a bat. It was a miserable evening.

I was hoping that pain in my leg would lessen into the sore category. One step this morning let me know that I was wrong. OMG my leg hurts so much!  I don't know if or how I am going to make it through the day because I can barely make it to the couch without crying.  

Before making any decisions I'm going to play with socks and pads to see if I can obtain mobility. I'm not terribly optimistic.  Being an amputee sucks sometimes, and today is one of those days.  

Bacon and Eggs

 Yesterday was an exciting day for Timmy because his big brother invited him to an event on his college campus. I was surprised when Robby called me at 3, asking us if we would bring Timmy and the Halloween costumes to his campus for "Shep or Treat." Because we are planning on trick-or-treating through the college town on Saturday, we had decided to skip the event this year. Always happy to oblige, Timmy gleefully grabbed his treat bucket, the costumes before running to the car to meet Robby.

Someday Timmy will realize that Robby's true purpose was not to trick-or-treat, but to employ his younger brother as his unwitting wingman. Timmy was trick-or-treating among the campus booths, but Robby was chatting with a 'friend' who had to work the event by running a game. 

Timmy played that game 5 times. 

Timmy spent the evening with his big brother and Robby was provided an opportunity to chat up a cute girl. All told, it was a successful night.  I wonder what adventures today will bring...

 

 

Withdrawn

 I have officially withdrawn my grievance and accepted that I will not receive the full compensation promised. We are 11 weeks into the school year and I am tired of the fight. I was finally given credit for the majority of my previous years, so I feel comfortable walking away from the promised incentives. The mental load of this fight has felt oppressive.

I feel like I was actively deceived by numerous administrative and personnel entities throughout the hiring process. Despite this knowledge, I am choosing to move forward in a professional manner. I thoroughly enjoy working with my students, and they are going to remain my focus for the remainder of the school year.

Sending the letter withdrawing my grievance felt like a liberation. While I realize I am walking away from promised compensation, holding my head high and walking away on my own terms feels good. I am not going to be forced into a role I don't want, despite the pressure from numerous sides. Holding boundaries is not easy, but it is worth it! 

Clean Out

 We had a busy albeit productive weekend. Saturday morning we woke up early and headed to PA to help my Mom for the day. After years of pleading, she finally acquiesced and ordered a dumpster to assist with her garage clear out. Our little family is well-versed with dumpster clean-outs and were happy to show off our purging skills. 

The weather for our clean-out day could not have been better. With temperatures in the mid 60s and the sun shining brightly, it was the perfect day to work outside. I anticipated that we would be working through the afternoon. We had the dumpster filled by lunch. 

Yikes!

We tried to convince my nephews to use their trucks to run some trash to the dump, but they refused. Lacking any more dumpster room, we had to finish earlier than expected. We didn't get as much of her house cleaned out as I would have liked, but the garage and shed are completely clear and usable. 

On Sunday Timmy and I decorated for Halloween before taking Robby back to school. Robby's Fall break went by so quickly, but I am happy knowing that Thanksgiving is right around the corner. This is going to be a crazy week because it is Halloween!

Have a good day! 

Friday

 While the boys were busy touring battlefield sites, I was sitting in meetings before spending my afternoon hosting my White Cane Day parties.  Two elementary students were absent last week, so we decided to bump the celebrations so that they didn't miss out. I loved seeing the enthusiasm of their classmates as they cheered and celebrated their friends' emerging cane skills. Yet again, the kids are leading the way with kindness.

Today I have more meetings before I take some kiddos into the community this afternoon. We are going to be practicing light controlled intersections in the city. It is a big day for them, so wish us luck!

This weekend we will be heading to PA to help my mom clean out her garage and basement. We have a dumpster being delivered, and Saturday will be an all-hands-on-deck situation so we can help dig her out of decades of accumulation. If not fun, we will hopefully be productive. 

Field Trips

 Happy Almost Friday! 

This morning I'm the only one rising to go to work this morning because Scott decided to take the day off to chauffeur Robby to different battlefield sites. Because Robby doesn't have a car on campus, activities that require travel are difficult for him to schedule. With fall break starting today, it feels like the perfect day to knock out his mandatory field trips. 

Unfortunately I cannot join them on their adventures because my day is filled with meetings and evaluations. I can't say I'm looking forward to it, but I recognize it is a necessary evil in my job. I much prefer working directly with the kids instead of the adults, but every once in awhile I'm thrown in a room full of adults for hours on end. Today is one of those days.

Wish me luck! 

Achy

 While I'm loving the cooler temperatures, the cold air in the morning is a shock to my system. My liner was so chilly this morning it was painful to pull onto my limb. It looks like I have to start warming it up again in the mornings because that is a miserable way to wake up!

My leg has been doing okay enough. I still need a new one, but the fit of my socket is still functional. My foot still clicks occasionally when I step, but I have learned how to create a temporary patch. I hate that I keep delaying my new leg, but I honestly do not know where to go. This is the first time I am in a void of prosthetic care. I know I am going to have to drive, but making that final decision and just going with it has been difficult.

In the meantime, I am making due. My legs are exhausted by the time I come home, but it is manageable. As long as I stay ambulatory, I will keep plugging away. Right now though, my legs are so tired I just want to keep my prosthetic off and rest all day. Wish me luck, because rest is not on my agenda. 

Unwinding

 Happy Monday!

Although I'm not terribly keen to put on real pants and head out into the world this morning, I did have a relaxing and enjoyable weekend. The weather was gorgeous, allowing me ample time to hang out by the fire pit and just chat with the boys. I should have tackled a list of household chores, but I opted to just totally unwind. After the professional chaos of the past few weeks, I just needed a break.

On Saturday we were surprised by a quick visit from my niece. She was driving through the area and was able to swing by for dinner. It was great seeing her! It wasn't until she saw Timmy that she realized that they haven't seen each other since Thanksgiving. That reality made me sad, and I also realized that I need to do better to make sure that doesn't happen again.

Today the weather should be gorgeous and I'm looking forward to exploring outside with my students. October is an amazing month to be an O&M instructor and I plan to soak up every outdoor opportunity. Before I know it we will be confined inside. 

Have a great day! 

Kitty Care

 Yesterday was a lot of fun. I felt like a Magic Maker, popping into classrooms with fun activities and supplies throughout the day. While the parties were fun, they were also purposeful. Teaching peers about the mobility cane and the needs of their classmates are lessons that will truly follow them for a lifetime. I have no regrets about the outreach, although it did leave me exhausted by the end of the day.

Thankfully today is Friday, which means tonight I can begin to decompress and unwind from the chaotic week.  Robby is coming home for the weekend to care for Charlie Cat. Each day I am certain it may be Charlie's last, but the skeletal remains of his childhood friend is still plugging along. I know one of these days I will be right, and my heart will be broken.  In the meantime, we will continue to provide kitty hospice care at home.

Have a good weekend! 

Cane Day

 Yesterday I slept in, lounged around the house until late morning and then headed to Virginia to meet a friend for lunch. I don't often play hooky from work, but when I do I try to make the most of the time. I thoroughly enjoyed missing the professional development training and spending the day restoring and fortifying my mental health. A battle is brewing, and I need all of my strength.

I am surprised by the number of individuals who have accused me of being unprofessional by taking a day off.  I contend that the most professional time for me to take my planned leave is for days when my absence will create as little impact as possible. No kids missed their sessions, and no teachers were inconvenienced by personal day. Being a professional transcends the ability to sit quietly through meetings for 8 hours.

Although I was off work, I spent last night working on my activities and gathering supplies for my White Cane Day celebrations. I'm excited to spend the day celebrating my students with all of their classes. It should be a fun day!

 

One More Day

 One more day before my impromptu day off. I find it odd that I am so ridiculously excited about taking a random Wednesday off simply for my own mental health. Perhaps this is a sign that I need to disconnect more often! 

Unfortunately, I am not in a position that lends itself to taking leave. I am responsible for making up all of the time I miss with my students. If I am not at work, I am committing to working twice as hard to get caught up. That pressure sucks the fun out of playing hooky. Besides, I've said it before because it is true- I really like my students. It is the adults that drain the life out of me.

Yesterday Scott took off work so that he could hang out with Timmy. The pair went to Hibachi for lunch (no doubt Hamlet's choice) and went for haircuts. Although they only ran errands, both seemed to have enjoyed their afternoon together. 

Have a great day! 

Rest

Another weekend has come and gone. I wish I could say that I spent my time studiously working on my presentation deck for my grievance hearing. Instead, I took Robby to the mall and watched Halloween movies with the boys. I still have a few weeks to prepare, but the time away from all of this nonsense was needed for my own mental health.

This is going to be a wonky week because I took off work on Wednesday. Professional Development meetings are scheduled, and as soon as I saw the presentations I immediately knew that I would prefer to submit to a pap smear by Captain Hook. I haven't taken a day off all year, so I think this is the perfect opportunity to enjoy some me time without missing time with my students. 

I just need to get through today and tomorrow.... wish me luck! 

Notes

 My hearing date has been set for October 28th.  Do I expect a positive outcome to my grievance?  I do not.  After all, we are living in West Virginia and residents of this state have not proven themselves to be trustworthy or especially honest. I fully expect the establishment to win, but that doesn't mean I am not worthy of a fight.

Luckily, I take meticulous notes and maintain copious amounts of documentation. As soon as I was approached about becoming a full-time employee, I carefully noted every conversation involving promised salary etc. I know who said exactly what and when it was said. I don't think it will move the needle, but the blatant dishonesty should make the Board members uncomfortable.

Sigh.  I hate all of this. I find it demeaning and demoralizing. 

This weekend I'm going to do my best to disconnect from the work frustrations and just focus on having fun with my family. I'm thinking we need to decorate for Halloween!  Whatever I end up doing, I hope to come back on Monday in a better headspace than I feel this morning.

 

Blatant Incompetence

 I am beginning day 41 of working without knowing my salary, and the situation is turning from ridiculous to infuriating. I find myself seething with rage when I am working across the table from blatantly incompetent teachers whose position and salary have both been solidified, not through education and experience but through the WV Good Olde Boys system. In the meantime, I have been nominated as tribute to be the pawn in a Battle Royale between Special Education and HR. 

Who will win? At this point, it has become blatantly obvious that I will emerge at the bottom.  I'm angry!

My anger at the County is starting to infect my views on everybody who works within this system.  Thankfully the weather is favorable. I still love working with the kids- it is just every other adult in the buildings whom I want to avoid.

 

First Day

 Yesterday Robby had his first official day at work.  I was delighted ( and a little surprised) that he thought to send me a photo before officially clocking in. I was also touched that he brought a dozen donuts with him to share with his new co-workers. He remembered my telling him that my Dad, his Candy Papaw, taught me to always be the employee to bring donuts to the office. My Dad encouraged me to do this throughout my career because he swore that it provided an internal protection against the backstabbing and sniping that often occurs within offices. After all, it is hard to throw the person who brings donuts under the proverbial bus.  

He brought the donuts, even though he barely remembers my Dad. My heart leapt with an unexpected joy when he shared his intentions. I know my Dad would have been absolutely delighted!

While Robby had a great day at work, mine continues to frustrate me in unexpected ways. I love working with the kids, but the payroll/administrative issues are beginning to wear me down. It is October 6th. I have been working since August 14th, yet I still do not know my salary.  Yesterday I was forced to file an official grievance, which left me gutted. 

I love my job working directly with the kids, but I am growing to hate everything else. The administrative red tape feels designed to entangle and trap. With each day I am feeling more detached and less resolved to stay and work for a solution.  I breaks my heart, but I have begun to send out applications for contract opportunities. The school year is 25% over next week, and this should have been resolved when the contract was issued!

 

Archivist

 Robby called us on Friday with some amazing news. After successfully completing his required 25 hours of archival volunteer work, he was offered a student paid internship for the remainder of the year. To have received his first job in a position directly within his professional interests is amazing. 

He thoroughly enjoyed his time at the archives and found himself quickly encompassed by whatever task was his focus. Not only did he find the tasks interesting, but he discovered that he really liked his coworkers. A combination of young graduates and students, the archive is a hub of historians and those who value its preservation. Perhaps more than the experience and the money, Robby is delighted to be spending more time with this group of individuals.

Congratulations Robby, the newest intern archivist on campus!

Aside from celebrating Robby's new professional accomplishment, our weekend was relatively boring. I spent Saturday and most of Sunday puttering around the house, cooking and cleaning in anticipation of the week ahead. Scott delighted with the return of both football and hockey seasons. Timmy has been busying himself with his newest obsession: computer chess.  

Have a great week. 

 

Joking Reveal

 While I am not hiding my prosthesis at work, I do make an effort to keep it concealed in professional settings. When I am in schools, I want the focus to be on my students and not on their one legged teacher. Inevitably we are swarmed by curious eyes when my prosthesis is visible. I'm usually very open to these teachable moments, but not at the expense of my student's comfort and instructional time.

Yesterday, when I arrived to work with a student I found him outside at recess. Instead of interrupting play time, I stopped to chat for a few minutes with his one-on-one instructional assistant. This young man reminds me of Robby. He is 22, a little awkward with a really big heart. I enjoy chatting with him because I always leave with the same impression: He is so young and I am so old.

The aide strolled over to me with a look of mischief on his face. My mom-radar was on high as I knew something was coming.  I asked him how he was doing, and he began his rehearsed shtick.  

"Well Miss Peggy, I'm not doing too good."

    Oh no! What's going on?

"Well, I'm not feeling too good. I was mowing the lawn this weekend and I ran over my feet. See my feet?"  

He proceeds to point to his feet, upon which he is wearing skeleton Halloween shoes. He then begins to snicker and asks me if I understand his joke, pointing to his shoes in a cartoon like fashion.

I stood quiet for a moment as I tried to figure out what to do. I quickly realized that I was friendly enough with this young whippersnapper show him how it is done.

"I'm sorry about your feet. Looks like I'm not the only one left without a leg to stand on." 

I pulled up my pant leg, exposing my prosthesis.

This adult kid's jaw hit the playground mulch as he processed what he was seeing. He stammered both apologies and astonishment as we have worked together for almost a year without him realizing. I'm not going to lie, I worked hard on my gait and it feels good to know that my limp is undetectable to most.  I assured him that I was joking and not insulted, and walked away like a boss.

 

     

Beautiful Weather

 Yesterday was an easy way to ease back into the work week. The weather was absolutely gorgeous. Where last week I was trotting around in the rain, yesterday I was working under bright blue skies in 70 degree air. It was perfect! (As a bonus, none of my students complained about walking outside with me.)

I came home from work, finished some paperwork before heading outside to enjoy the firepit with Timmy. He spent the night swinging and riding his bike through the neighborhood. I am amazed that he has logged nearly 2,000 miles since receiving his new bike in April. I guess any doubt on whether or not he would like it has been answered.  

Today the weather should be just as favorable. It should be a good one! 

Relaxed

 I had a great weekend relaxing and hanging out with my Mom. While we didn't tackle anything on her constantly growing to-do list, we did go shopping and eat out most of our meals. I was delighted to find a sale on the 'perfect' work shirt and I grabbed one in every color. I felt like I hit the lottery with both the design and the price. (It seems that I am easily excited as I become older.)

Unfortunately I had to head home earlier than I would have preferred in order to get ahead of the encroaching storm. I was sad to leave, but I also left well-slept, well-fed and ready to tackle the week ahead. I guess there is just something about being with Mom that makes everything feel better!

This week won't be too busy and, with the cooler weather, it should not be physically taxing. Hopefully the weather and my schedule will align, making this a great week to end September.  Have a great day! 

PA bound

 Thursdays are rough. By the time I come home from work my legs feel like they are cement blocks and my back and hips are screaming at me. I've tried to rearrange my schedule to lighten the physical load, but logistics supersedes my comfort. As it stands, Thursdays are Mom's tired day and Timmy has learned to not expect a fancy or big dinner.  In all honesty, he usually benefits from my physical exhaustion by eating his dinner from a paper bag.

I suspect Hamlet will be eating several meals out of paper bags over this weekend. I'm going to visit my Mom for a few days, leaving the boys to fend for themselves. I'm looking forward to getting away to just hang out and relax with my Mom. 

Have a good weekend!