Tired

 Slowly but surely we are settling into our new home. Yesterday our trash can, a bidet and Robby's bed were all delivered. (We were all excited for very unique reasons.) The living room is quasi-assembled and the kitchen is functional, but the majority of our treasures remain boxed in the basement. At this point, I want to get through Christmas before I go into unpacking warrior mode.

My leg has been feeling the impact of this move. I am developing bruises and small pinch cuts where my socket is no longer fitting. In the new year I definitely need to add "get a new leg" to my list because I'm tired of hobbling around.

In fact, today I'm just really tired. I think I may take the day off and just rest. I've been going at full speed for several weeks and I am feeling the fumes. Who knows, maybe I can capture some holiday spirit for my efforts!

We moved!

 My apologies for missing a week of blogs. As the movers began to haul away boxes on Tuesday morning, it became clear that we were not ready for the impending move. Despite the countless hours I spent carefully packing and planning, the day was chaotic and beyond exhausting. 

During the initial estimate, our movers said they believed it would take approximately 6-8 hours for the entire move. After it took the movers 6 hours to pack up the house in Virginia, I gave up any semblance of planning and switched into moving survival mode. After an extraordinarily long 13 total hours, we were surrounded by a maze of boxes and furniture in a new house in West Virginia.

Scott was an absolute rock star during the move. He was still outside, running up and down stairs and directing the movers late into the evening. I tried to keep up, but my body shut down. I ended up hiding in the bathtub with the cats.

Slowly we have been settling in and getting used to our new home. The house is beautiful and Friend (and Timmy) seem to love our snow covered wooded yard. I know it will take awhile for it to feel like home, but I am up for the challenge!

 

 

Ready or Not

 This morning I'm sitting on the couch in the quiet of my living room, as I have for so many other days, but today is different. Today we sell this home and purchase our new one. This is my last morning as a homeowner in Virginia. Our house is filled with boxes and chaos as we pack up our memories and 20 years of stuff. 

Yesterday Timmy and Friend headed to PA while Robby went back to college. It feels appropriate that Scott and I are left to close out the house. We started this adventure together, so it is kind of fun to finish it out strong as a team. 

Today we go to settlement at 3 and will be packing furiously both before and after. The movers arrive tomorrow and we will embark on our new adventure. Wish us luck!!  (I will return on Wednesday from the new home!!)

Almost ready

 Our time in this home is coming to an end. It is impossible to believe that on Monday we sell our house and on Tuesday we begin our lives anew in West Virginia. Packing up has been cathartic as I weed through every possession our family has accumulated over nearly two decades, trying to cull out what is useful and needed, what has gone beyond its usefulness for us and needs to be donated, and what is linked to memories that are cherished. The task has been emotional and exhausting, but we are finally coming to an end. 

This weekend will be spent packing and disassembling our Virginia lives in anticipation for Monday. Ready or not, it looks like we are moving!  Wish us luck, we are going to need it.

Packing

Yesterday was spent focusing on packing and purging Robby's room. I found it considerably easier to pack everything up with him residing in the dorm.  After 6 hours, an obscene number of boxes and a ginormous trash bag, his room is nearly ready for the move. Our walls are bare and our home is beginning to feel more like a house that we are exiting. 

My goal today is to finish Robby's bedroom and perhaps the computer room. I am trying to push packing the kitchen until the end of the week because living without plates and cuts feels very inconvenient. While I've been busy packing the boxes Scott has spent his time ferrying them downstairs to the basement. Slowly but surely, we are getting there.

Pack-a-palooza day #2, wish us luck.

Thanksgiving

 This past Thanksgiving was difficult. Between navigating the move, the sudden change in my employment status and the first holiday after Jae was killed by Lt. John Ellen in Austin Texas on April 3, joy was elusive. It is no secret that I am struggling this year to tap into the holiday spirit. At this point, I'm thinking of throwing up the white flag and calling it a minimalist Christmas.

I spent Friday and Saturday with Scott selling at the mall. Yesterday I stayed home and packed while Robby and Scott handled the sales. After the mall closed Rob was ferried back to his dorm to finish out the semester. It is hard to believe that his semester finishes in two weeks. In many ways it feels like I just dropped him off at school, but so much as transpired it also feels like a lifetime ago. 

This week is all about packing. We go to settlement in one week from today (yikes) and the movers arrive next Tuesday. It is hard to believe that this is all going to happen. Of course, I keep waiting for a wrench to hijack the process. After the year that I've had, nothing would surprise me anymore.

Tired

 This year has left me feeling completely gutted. The past few weeks have been especially difficult.  I’ve tried to push through, but the weight of it all feels overwhelming, leaving me raw and drained. I am fighting the overwhelming urge to hide under my covers in a dark room, but the house needs to be packed and life must proceed. 

So I am packing, listening to audio books and trying to keep my mind as busy as possible. When I feel like I'm going to cry, I pack downstairs so the boys don't hear. We have been transparent about the situation, but want to shield them from my emotions as much as possible. Timmy in particular becomes upset when I cry and I want to spare him from this pain. 

Today I'm going to pack a few more boxes, pack up my bag and head to visit my Mom for Thanksgiving. I'm not feeling particularly thankful or holidayish this year, but I know that time marches. Despite the turmoil that is swirling around us, the boys deserve and expect a holiday season.  I'm going to do my best to fake my way through.

Broken

 Friday afternoon I logged into a scheduled meeting with my boss. I have been working at the organization for four years and was feeling confident. My performance and my numbers are solid, my feedback has been extremely positive and I know that my efforts have significantly been helping people. Things have been going so well in fact that I thought the meeting might be to broach the idea of transitioning from contractual to full-time employee. 

Imagine my shock when, after exchanging pleasantries for 10 minutes, the tone immediately shifted. The love the program and the community that I have built. Unfortunately, due to the current transitions within the company, they don't feel like they have the resources necessary to grow. Therefore, they have decided to shelf the program.

My dream job would come to an end at the conclusion of 2024. 

I am not quite certain what happened during the rest of the meeting because I was in shock. I spent the weekend reeling, trying to make heads of tails out of what has just become of my life. In an instant, everything has changed.  Again.

2024 is the year that broke me. I know I will regroup and we will move forward. But right now, I feel gutted and defeated. I feel like the universe is working overtime to demonstrate that it truly doesn't care. 

 

Uncomfortable

 Hopefully (fingers crossed) our septic will be repaired today. I was overly optimistic yesterday with my expectation that we were done. Apparently yesterday the electrician's repairs were completed. They also pumped the septic in preparation for the pump installation. Unfortunately, they failed to verify that they had the necessary pump in stock. It turns out that they do not, so project completion was bumped to this afternoon.

Because they already pumped the septic, we are under a strict 'no water waste' restriction. I filled our sinks up with boxes and put signs on each toilet to warn against flushing. Hopefully we will be able to resume water use this afternoon. Our bathrooms are becoming odoriferous and the dishes are piling up on my countertops. At this point in the move, living in this house has become unpleasant.

While Scott is dealing with the septic issues and repairmen, I will be picking up Robby from school. It is hard to believe that we are already at Thanksgiving break! I'm so excited to have him home for an entire week. The timing is perfect because I plan on using the time to prioritize and complete packing this house.

Septic

 Sigh.  

Our yard is filled with holes and my house is overflowing with boxes. Everywhere I turn I see more boxes, moved furniture and items waiting to be boxed. I can't watch television anymore because of the anxiety that it causes. No matter what I do, I cannot seem to escape the physical and mental chaos surrounding me at the moment. 

In order to sell our house we need to provide an inspection certificate stating that the septic system is in operational order. I have been worried about the state of our septic system because every neighbor has experienced catastrophic failures. After much digging and deliberation, it was determined that the majority of our septic system is just fine, with the exception of the blown pump. 

About 9 years ago we experienced a lightening strike which resulted in a mixture of damage, including blown electronics. Because the pump was covered, we had no reason to suspect that it was impacted by the strike. But the burnt marks on the nonfunctional pump is a pretty good indicator of the cause of damage. Regardless of the cause, a new pump has been ordered and will hopefully be installed today. Once the system is cleared, the holes and be filled and there will be no more barriers to our move.

Fingers crossed!

Still Hate Texas

 Perhaps in what ultimately became an act of grace, I have been so busy that it has been relatively easy for my mind to become distracted from the pain I feel over the decision to not indict the officer who killed my brother. Lt. John Ellen received the news that he would return to his life without consequence.  When I think about it I become so angry and upset that I cannot focus. At this time, I need to keep the pain contained and out of my consciousness because I would not be able to focus if I allowed myself to ride the wave.

Because the weather was gorgeous on Saturday we all put on gloves and worked in the garage. Within three hours the structure was purged, cleaned and organized. My home is being transformed into a maze of boxes and furniture. It is hard to believe that we are going to be in a new home in three weeks! 

Today I am back to work, organizing and packing. Right now, I'm so grateful for the distraction to keep my mind from Texas.

Broken

 Yesterday we heard that the State of Texas will not indict Officer Ellen (at least I have a name) for shooting Jae Friedman in the neck during a mental health check on April 3, 2023. Blind and in a wheelchair because of an above knee amputation which was the result of prisoner medical mismanagement, Jae's killing was condoned as appropriate.  This will never be okay.

I'd say God help us all, but I no longer believe in a higher power.

Wolf

We spent this past weekend in Altoona PA at the SciFi Convention. While Scott and I sold FlexyFriends in the exhibitor hall, Timmy and Rob explored the convention. Between the amazing cosplay and the retro video arcade, the boys were in their element. One of the opportunities presented at the convention included petting and posing with a wolf. Of course Timmy was all over this and began to plan his photo on the first day.

Sunday morning we dressed and headed down to the vendor hall. (I was wearing shorts, which is important for the story.) Knowing that the line gets very long, Timmy and I headed straight to the wolf encounter. Even though we were early, we still had to wait. Because each interaction takes 10 minutes, the line moved slow and there was much time for anticipation.

   

After waiting for nearly an hour, the curtain draws and it is time for us to enter. Timmy's smile is huge and he starts to bop up and down. Out of nowhere, a guy steps right in front of Timmy. I didn't see this dude swoop in but he nearly knocked us over as he elbowed a pathway through our bodies.

Looking ahead he muttered,  "I have a disability, so I'm going to go now. You can wait." 

 

The worker opens the curtain, and the dude saunters right in front of both Timmy and me (holding but not using his cane). The curtain was shut in our face. I was gobsmacked. 

 

The worker smiled, shrugged, and whispered "You understand, he has a disability." 

 

I think she thought we would be okay with it?

 

Before I knew what was coming out of my mouth (that happens to me sometimes), I said while not whispering "If he is going to play the disability card, he damn well better make sure he is going to win." 

 

The dude opens the curtain and glares at me. 

 

So I said it again, in case he didn't hear me the first time from behind the curtain.

 

"If you are going to play the disability card, you need to make sure you are going to win. I have also been standing for almost an hour, which is not easy to do with a single leg. In the hierarchy of disability, I win but I still waited my turn because that is what decent f*cking people do."

( I then extend my prosthetic leg Rockette style and hold it out dramatically for all to see.) 

 

The worker, who quickly claimed she did not see my carbon fiber leg, started to stammer. The dude turned as red as his hat and went back behind the curtain. An individual dressed like Strawberry Shortcake clapped. Spiderman gave me a high five and some anime character I didn't recognize offered me a fist bump. 

 

Our wolf encounter was comped.

 

 

We did it!

 We celebrated Walking Day by signing a contract to purchase our new home!

I am ridiculously excited to check "locate dream home" off our to-do list. Scott and I have spent the past three weeks driving throughout West Virginia in search of our new home. It took us longer than we anticipated, but I can promise that the wait was worth it. This home is amazing!

Signing the contract started a brand new countdown clock. We go to settlement on both homes on or before December 9. Yep, we have less than one month to move.  It's a good thing I've been packing for months!  The next few weeks are sure to be chaotic and frenzied as we pack up two decades and prepare to embark on a new family adventure.

Walking Day!

 Happy Walking Day to me!!

21 years ago I crutched into the prosthetic office, terrified and exhausted from the physical and mental ordeal. I did not know what to expect, but I was hoping that the pain would be gone when I tried to walk. I will never forget how foreign it felt to be walking without pain.

 Yeah.  After last night's election results, I'm not even going to try.

Updates

 We sold our house without having to go through the formality of formally listing it. While we are absolutely delighted with the ease of the sale, it has started a stopwatch on our family. We are committed to getting out of our current home by December 30. With the stroke of the keyboard, our life plan became very real. 

I would feel so much better about this if we had a home to move to. It has taken a few weeks longer than we anticipated because we were looking in the wrong areas. Now that we have our future location narrowed to a few towns, the home search is yielding better results. At least the accelerated timeline has forced my attention away from the elections.

Speaking of elections, there is a lot at stake today. Please vote.

Hotdog!

 It was odd celebrating Halloween without Robby, but I refused to let my missing him deter from making it a special day for Timmy. From a special Chick Fil-A breakfast to homemade cookies for his Halloween party, I tried to infuse his day with little surprises. His bedroom was filled with giggles and shrieks throughout the afternoon as he celebrated Halloween with his classmates. 

I made "Monster Mash" for dinner while Timmy artfully carved his pumpkin. After watching the minutes tick down until 6 pm, it was finally go time. Timmy pulled on his costume and he and Scott headed out to trick-or-treat. (Unlike his brother, Timmy asked his dad to take him out of costume this year.)

For our first Halloween in this house, Scott and Robby dressed as hotdogs. Last night, for our final trick-or-treat on our little road, Timmy dressed as a hotdog. 

I like when things come full circle.

Happy Halloween

 Happy Halloween!

The holiday feels strange this is the first year for so many reasons, among them preparing to move and Robby going to college. I realized this morning that this has been the first Halloween since becoming a mom that I haven't had to tackle a costume for Robby. Thankfully Timmy is still a huge fan of trick-or-treating and has been planning the route for months. I'll unveil his costume tomorrow morning, but it is safe to say that he has stuck with his food theme.

Have a great holiday!

Pressure

 It seems that my new schedule now includes nightly trips to West Virginia to find a new home. I am trying to take the entire experience in stride. As soon as we discover our new home the constant trips will stop and I can concentrate on packing. Until then, the back-and-forth treks are necessary so we can discover the perfect new home for our family.

Thankfully, we selling our current home was considerably easier than we anticipated. On a lark we invited realtors in so that we could start to sort through the to-do tasks before listing. To our delight, we were offered as-is contracts.  As soon as we sign (which we plan to do on Halloween), the countdown starts. We will have 60 days to clear out the house and move.

 Talk about pressure!

Packing

 I spent the weekend packing (and purging) around the house. I started in my closet and, once finished, moved into the basement. I've been delaying conquering the basement because of the sheer quantity of 'stuff,' but it has turned into an easier project than I anticipated. Because I am not emotionally attached to the items in the basement, I found it easier generate a healthy donation pile.

I have been so productive with packing that I have now run out of boxes. I ordered more to be delivered later this week. I'm hoping that I estimated correctly and that this will be our final box delivery. In the meantime, I'm just going to continue to sort items into piles. I don't want to lose the packing momentum. 

While I have been busy packing and organizing for the move, Scott has been focusing on finding our new home. We have signed with a realtor and have packed schedule of walk throughs scheduled for tomorrow. Fingers crossed we have better luck this time!

Mountain Valleys

 Our house hunting expedition was not fruitful but we were successful in accurately identifying features that we don't like. Trying to remain optimistic, I keep reminding Scott (and myself) that we learned a lot and made progress towards our dream home simply by discovering where we do not want to live and what we do not want to have to manage in a house and yard. We were hoping to fall in love with one of the homes we saw yesterday but were instead left feeling deflated and worried. What if we never find a house as much as we have loved this one?

As it turns out, neither Scott nor I like 'mountain living.' We aren't fond of dirt roads that are relied upon by residents who live up the mountain.  Driving up the gravel and dirt roads, Scott and I couldn't help but focus upon how we would feel doing this drive several times a day. Not only would it be miserable, but our cars are not equipped to live up a mountain. We would need new 4-wheel drive vehicles, which would add to our expenses.

We are not mountain people, we are mountain valley people. We are now seeking a home that looks out at the mountains, not down upon them. Hopefully narrowing down this huge difference will help us find our home.

Wish us luck this weekend!

House Hunting

 This morning Scott and I are heading out the door on our house hunting adventure. I'm excited because we have never really been house hunting together. We have lived in our current home for nearly 20 years and it was only the second we toured. This time we have 6 houses scheduled throughout the area today, so we will be busy and productive. Our goal is to narrow the field to two or three so that the boys can go and tour the options this weekend.  

Scott has spent hours scouring house listings within our preferred areas. While we are open to different lay-outs and concepts, we are staying firm on a few details. For one, I'm asking for all of the main living features to be on a single level. While I'm okay with a loft/rec room being upstairs or downstairs, I want to eliminate as many stairs as possible. I'm only going to get older in this house, and I want it to be able to accommodate us as we age.  

I also really want an office- a proper space with a door that actually closes. Scott wants a yard with a view but with minimal trees within the center of the yard. He is fine with trees on the perimeter or clustered together, but would prefer that large trees not be planted randomly around the house and in the yard. We have sustained too much damage to fallen limbs over the years and are not keen to worry through any more wind storms. 

I'm excited about our house hunting adventure. I have a new notebook and we hope to be able to record our thoughts as we drive between homes. Wish us luck, this is starting to feel very real!

Flippers

Timmy had a school vacation yesterday, allowing him to spend the afternoon outside in the gorgeous weather. I decided to make the most of the opportunity. (Timmy being idle and the weather being warm) by hooking up the pressure washer. It took him about 45 seconds to get the hang of the wand and to control the spray. As predicted, he loved the job. He spent 3 happy hours drawing pictures into before completely obliterating the dirt from our concrete stairs.

Our steps look fantastic, which is fortunate because today we have the first two realtors coming to evaluate our home. These realtors come from various "we buy your home in any condition" flipping companies. While I don't think we will end up going this route, we wanted to be fully educated about our options. It has been a long time since we have purchased and sold a home, and we are discovering that so much has changed.

Wish us luck!

Blue Dragon

This past weekend saw more boxes being packed for donation or the move and bags being filled with trash. I cleaned the closets in a small rec room off of our bedroom. Although the space was small, we managed to fill it with a lot of stuff over the past 20 years. I feel like I have finally hit a groove and have discovered the sweet spot between sentimentality and the need to downsize and clean. Of course, I'm sure I'm still packing more than necessary.

I had planned to spend the weekend at home packing while Scott worked at the mall selling FlexyFriends. Unfortunately he didn't feel well, so I ended up going along with him on Sunday to provide breaks and relief. I don't mind going to the mall to sell, but it makes for a really long week with no break. Robby was able to go with his Dad on Sunday, providing me with a day off at home. 

While we were selling on Saturday I had an incredible experience. A family approached our table with the middle aged dad leading the charge. He reached over everything to grab a small blue baby dragon towards the back. As I watched the smile wash over his face I was optimistic for sale, but I did not expect the story that followed.

Grasping the baby dragon and choking back tears, he sent his wife to the other side of our table so we could speak quietly. Usually this is done to protect gift privacy, so Scott took up his role of entertainer while I finished the transaction with the dad. It turns out the dragon was not for his children, but was a precious gift for himself.

Holding the baby dragon next to his chest like a child's plush toy, he explained that his dad died suddenly when he was 6 years old. One of the strongest memories he holds of his dad was receiving a blue dragon from him, a toy that he absolutely loved. After his dad died his mom struggled (he recounted childhood trauma for nearly 5 minutes), she ended up throwing away everything the dad had ever provided, including the dragon.

Obviously this is not the same dragon, yet it evoked such a strong response in the man that he vowed to keep it in a space of honor in his home. He thanked us for the toy, explaining that he hasn't felt this connected to his dad since he died. After searching for a way to connect with that childhood memory, he found it through our little blue dragon.

I just thought that was a fun story to share for a Monday morning. Have a great week!

Domino

I feel like Scott and I finally knocked over the first 'Domino' which set the events which will eventually lead to our new home. After procrastinating, we finally chose the new flooring for our basement and bedroom. We also scheduled the plumber and somebody to repair the drywall to come out next week and we arranged to tour 5 homes that have piqued our interest online. And, although I may regret this decision because of the ensuing spam calls, we began the process of obtaining quotes to sell our current home 'as-is.' 

Nothing was put into a box, but I feel like we made a lot of progress. With each step I'm feeling more excitement about the coming move. Although I've loved my house, I'm really looking forward to a fresh start! Hopefully we will be able to make that dream a reality before Spring. (Scott still hopes for a move before Christmas, but I am more realistic and less optimistic about that possibility.)

Unfortunately we won't be able to get a lot of packing or house prep done over the weekend because we have (another) FlexyFriends event. This is our only time that we will be at the Valley Mall in Hagerstown this year, so if you are in the area please swing by and say hello. 

Ramen

 A few weeks ago during an extremely chaotic moment in the kitchen, Timmy asked me an odd question. "Momom, what is something that you never thought you'd experience in your lifetime?"  It was a fabulous question! If it hadn't been posed while my hand was up a chicken's bum and the cat wasn't trying to knock the potatoes off the counter, I would have provided a thoughtful answer. Instead, in an attempt to quiet the kitchen and make my food loving kiddo happy, I said microwavable ramen. 

Throughout the week he came to me to randomly discuss the attributes of microwavable ramen. 1. You don't have to dirty another dish. 2. You don't need to measure the water. 3. It is easier for kids to make by themselves. Yep, microwave ramen has it all. 

Discussing the wonders of microwave ramen did not tip me off to anything unusual. I did become concerned when I received an email, inviting parents to view the "Advances in Our Generation" classroom presentation. I felt a panic wash over me when I logged in to watch the show.

The first classmate presented on the artificial organs. Another talked about living on the International Space Station. A third talked about carrying a computer in your pocket. A fourth talked about the advances and potential of AI. Timmy finished out his group with a wonderful presentation on the world-shattering advance of microwavable ramen- complete with a self-made cellphone video of him demonstration its preparation.

Taxes

 Yesterday morning I woke up in a panic as I realized that our taxes were due.  The chaos of my brother's death made trying to navigate TurboTax unnecessarily frustrating in April, so I opted for the October extension. We've always known that the deadline was looming but, as it always seems to happen in our family, life intervenes and we became busy. Thankfully we still made the filing deadline (with 13 hours to spare) and a crisis was averted.

It probably doesn't need to be said, but I hate filing taxes.

While I was working through the forms, Timmy returned to school after his fall break. He had a great time but I think he was happy to be reunited with his friends. He chatted through much of his lunch break and was late logging out of school because he was "hanging with his homies." His interest and enthusiasm for school has been growing as the year progresses. He loves his new teacher and his classmates. I'm glad that we will be able to keep him in the program when we move because it will be something stable and familiar.

With the taxes filed, today we will return our attention to packing.  Wish us luck!

Weekend Wrap-Up

While Robby and Scott were in Richmond at "Nightmare Weekend" I took Timmy (and Friend of course) to visit with my Mom. I decided that this was the perfect opportunity to shower Timmy with the activities and attention that he loves by planning a special weekend for him. Filled with surprise adventures, nearly everything was curated to his interests.

On Friday morning my sister and I swept Timmy away on his first adventure of the weekend: a trip to the corn maze and pumpkin patch. While he didn't finish the corn maze because Timmy quickly decided to forgo to 'stamp hunting' element of the activity. Opting instead to ditch the match and just meander through the stalks, we eventually escaped when we found our way back to the entrance. After the wagon ride to the pumpkin patch and a turn at the pumpkin blaster, we piled back into the car and returned to my Mom's house.

In the evening my sister bundled up Timmy in warmer clothes and surprised him with a trip to Hershey Park. Going to the amusement park with my sister is among Timmy's favorite activities. He had a blast! While he was busy with Sheri, I was able to relax with my Mom and go out for a quiet dinner.

On Saturday my Mom and I took Timmy to a ginormous all-you-can-eat buffet. He was in awe of the gastro delicacies laid out before him when he walked into the food complex. He vowed to get his money's worth and he did not disappoint. Saturday night my sister and I took Timmy to an immersive Halloween play. This was his first live theater experience and he was enthralled (and spooked). 

Sunday morning I took Timmy to Dave and Busters where we played until he finally won another large pickle. We also visited the Halloween store and enjoyed some cheese fries before returning to my Mom's to pack up. What a great weekend!

Going Home

Yesterday was busy yet productive. After work I managed to pack and stow three more boxes. While the progress is slower than I would like, the impact is starting to be felt. My house looks so much bigger with all of our items packed away. I've come to the conclusion that we either need more space or fewer things.

Packing (and real life) will take a backseat this weekend. Robby and Scott are heading down to Richmond to work at the Nightmare Richmond ComicCon-type event. The pair are excited for their three-day marathon selling adventure. Rob missed going to the last 'con' event because it was held during his first week at college. Thankfully this horror themed event corresponds with his autumn break, allowing him to attend.

While they are busy in Richmond, I'm taking Timmy to visit my Mom. It has been too long since I have been able to visit her and I'm looking forward to the escape. I have lots of plans for mini-adventures over the weekend, but I'm also looking forward to some down time. I could use a really good night sleep, and for some reason, I always seem to find it when visiting my Mom.

Sore

 I wish I could write a blog highlighting my productivity over the past 24 hours.  Unfortunately, yesterday my body was sore and my mind was busy with work. The moving boxes stayed unfolded and unpacked, waiting for another day. Hopefully I'll be able to resume today and keep the momentum going. I really want to get out of this house!

Although we didn't get anything else packed, I did manage to take the trash to the dump. Clearing 7 contractor sized garbage bags out of my living room feels amazing. Between the clutter being purged and my possessions being boxed, I am learning to embrace the minimalist lifestyle. 

Wish me luck packing!

Busy

 I am waking up extraordinarily sore. Every single muscle is yelling at me, chastising my efforts over the past two days. While my body is angry, I'm delighted with the results. While everybody else was watching TV and/or playing computer games, I managed to pack my entire dining and living rooms. 12 boxes are carefully stowed Tetris style against a wall and 7 contractor garbage bags are awaiting delivery to the dump. I feel like I made a lot of progress towards our move.

I wonder how much would be done if I weren't working alone? Sigh. I digress...

After packing through the morning and early afternoon I was ready for a break. Robby has midterms this week and was eager to return to the dorm a little earlier than normal. This will be a shortened week for him because his fall break starts on Thursday, just in time for him and his dad to work at the ComicCon event in Richmond. 

We are definitely in the busy season!

Packing Up

This morning I woke up to a full house. Robby has come home to visit (and to pack up his collection) for the weekend. Rob was fortunate to not have any classes on Friday, allowing him to carve out longer weekends. While I know it will be brief, it is fantastic having him home. I love having a full house!

Although I would love to let him relax and just play video games, I do need Robby to get some work done over the next few days. His WWII collection is robust and representative of all sides from the conflict. There are many items that feature insignias that are not representative of our values and that we personally find vile. Despite our aversion to the symbols, the historical significance of the artifact remains intact. Because I appreciate the feelings of disgust that are conjured when the symbols are viewed, I want everything packed up before we have workers in to ready the house. 

In addition to packing up his collection, Robby will be working at the "HalloThanksMas" event in Warren County, VA. We have no idea what to expect, but the weather is supposed to cooperate with this outdoor event. Fingers crossed for sales!

Rain

 We went through such a long spree of good weather that I almost feel guilty complaining about the constant rain and grey skies. I don't mind rainy days but a patch or two of sunshine would be appreciated. Even Friend seems deflated with the weather, preferring to sneak off to a pee pad instead of braving the cold rain. Thankfully it is supposed to lift by tomorrow- just in time for another Flexy sales event.

We have enjoyed a nice break from FlexyFriends sales events, but selling season is upon us. We have events scheduled for nearly every weekend between now and Christmas. Thankfully I have a husband who is retired and has offered to take the reins on the hustle. Hopefully the weather will cooperate with the outdoor event scheduled.

Today Scott is going to head to Shepherd to pick up Robby for the weekend. He needs to pick up clothes for the cooler weather and he is going to go help Scott sell for a day. With midterms starting next week, I know he is eager for a quiet spot to get his work done and study. 

I've missed his presence in the house. It will be nice to have him home, even if it is only for a few days. I am looking forward to my full house weekend.

 

Liar Liar

 In the early hours of Monday morning (around 4 AM) I heard Timmy stirring in his bedroom. When I checked on him I found him sitting in bed with big tears running down his cheeks. He was frustrated because he was exhausted and having trouble sleeping. Between his fatigue induced sobs he relayed his concerns about getting through the day without sleep. With the promise to let him sleep longer, I rubbed his back until he finally fell asleep.

Timmy finally woke up around 10:30 and reentered school after his class returned from lunch. As soon as he logged in he announced, "I slammed a Red Bull last night and pulled an all nighter."  

He lied. He did not have a Red Bull. He has never had a Red Bull. There is a zero percent chance that my sweet little liar had an energy drink of any variety because Scott and I have NEVER purchased them. I have never had an energy drink in this house, so I was gobsmacked by his explanation. 

When I asked him why he claimed to have consumed a Red Bull, he just shrugged and said that he said it for the laughs. This child is the reason I have so much grey hair

Much like when Robby told his pediatrician that I smoke (I have never smoked), any denial is going to make me look guiltier. 

Busy Selling

 This weekend was anything but restful and productive. On Saturday Scott was scheduled to sell FlexyFriends at a small local fair. Timmy and I were going to swing by to say hello but I had dedicated the day to packing more boxes and continuing to prepare for the move. When we arrived at the fair it was obvious the Scott was slammed. Our quick drop-in hello turned into a nearly 4 hours of marathon selling. 

Saturday was all hands on deck, including Timmy. While Scott and I tried to manage the hoards of customers, Timmy answered questions and helped to find preferred colors. He stepped right up and pitched in like a seasoned selling pro. We were delighted by the success of the event but also exhausted by the time everybody finally went home. 

On Sunday we had intended to go house hunting. While we did go to one Open House, we spent the majority of the afternoon hanging out with Robby. We went for lunch, took him out for ice cream and shopping for more Halloween decorations. It was great hanging out with him, but it didn't allow Scott or I to get anything else done around the house. 

The nasty weather has returned and it is supposed to rain for the rest of the week. Bleh! Have a good Monday!

ELO

Robby and Scott had a great time at the ELO concert last night. I received a few photos before the show where their excitement was obvious. Scott sent me a quick text mid show to relay Robby's enthusiasm and enjoyment. They rolled into he driveway around midnight and went straight to bed, although I know that at least Scott had a difficult time unwinding and completely relaxing. 

This morning we have to drive Robby back to campus for his afternoon lecture. Scott and I are going to take the remainder of the day and look at some neighborhoods that have piqued our interest although the heavy rain may delay our plans. With the house getting readied for the move and our new home search intensifying, it is starting to feel like our WV dream may become a reality.

Okay, perhaps referring to living in WV as a dream may be an overreach, but it is definitely our goal at the moment. Neither Scott nor I are viewing West Virginia as our dream location and we don't intend to live there until death. We are planning to stay until Timmy is done with high school. We aren't looking for our forever home. Instead, we are actively seeking our 7-10 year home.

Wish us luck!

Completion

 Yesterday I was slammed. I woke up around 4:30 and immediately began to finalize a project I've been developing for work. After successfully presenting the project that afternoon I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. Although I'll still be busy with work, I no longer have to juggle the stress of a time sensitive project ready to implode.  To celebrate, I logged off in the afternoon and helped Scott finish the bathrooms.

Can I just say, I'm amazed about the amount of stuff I managed to fit into my bathroom vanity cabinet? Yikes! In an effort to clear the space, I packed up no less than 15 gallons of assorted chemical household cleaners. Our new house will smell lemony fresh for the next decade.

 This experience has taught me that buying cleaners in bulk packs does not work for our family. While I had good intentions, I don't have any convenient way to store 2 gallons of PineSol cleaner easily. The huge bottle was tucked away with the intention of refilling the smaller bottle. By the time each small bottle was empty, I had forgotten where I stashed the bulk pack and assumed that I had used it all. After 18 years of this cycle, we have accumulated quite a stockpile. 

Today Scott is heading to pick up Robby before the pair rock out at an ELO concert this evening. Robby adores ELO and was ecstatic to receive the tickets for his graduation. We didn't know his course schedule when I bought the tickets, but thankfully it all worked perfectly. Robby won't miss any classes and the pair won't have to worry about a timeline. Hopefully they have fun, although the weather is miserable for the long drive.

Motivated

What began as a desire to bake a red velvet cake cascaded into my purging, organizing and cleaning my entire kitchen. I became frustrated on Saturday morning when I couldn't find the cocoa powder in my pantry. I decided to clean the shelf, which quickly turned into the entire pantry being unloaded. After the pantry was finished I felt motivated to continue the efforts.  

All together it took me about 10 hours to declutter and organize my kitchen. I've accumulated 10 contractor trash bags of trash, broken items and expired food which Scott will take to the dump this afternoon. Five boxes for donation will be picked up tomorrow and the four boxes I packed for the move have been stowed downstairs. At this point, the kitchen is ready for the move. 

I feel like Scott and I have transitioned from talking about what we need to do to move to actually putting action behind those words. Things are getting exciting and overwhelming. I'm going to lean into the excitement because it will hopefully continue my motivation to get the house packed.  

Talking about exciting- I would be remiss if I didn't mention Timmy's amazing day at school on Friday. His class zoomed with an astronaut on the International Space Station. He was absolutely amazed and talked about it nonstop throughout the weekend. He can't wait to log into school today to discover what else might happen.

Packing

With the bulk of my work project complete, this weekend I hope to spend the weekend readying the house for listing. My desire to leave this area is bordering on desperate. As projects slowly get ticked off the to-do list, the possibility of our move becomes more of a reality. The next few months will be busy but exciting!

Scott is going to spend the weekend finishing up some small painting projects. We are not repainting the house, but the bathrooms and Timmy's room both need attention. While he is busy painting, I plan on tackling the basement. Once I have that cleared out, we can start packing and moving boxes. 

Things are getting real!

Painting

 After nearly a month of gorgeous weather, yesterday we were met with grey skies and heavy rain. Somehow, the rainy day felt perfect. It was nice to have an excuse to not work outside or 'take advantage of the weather.' Sometimes, just staying inside is exactly what you need.

While I was engrossed in a huge project for work, Scott didn't let the rain discourage him from his house preparations. Instead of focusing on the yard he repainted our bathroom. It is amazing how a few coats of paint can completely transform a room! I *almost* feel inspired to stay here.

We aren't going to repaint the entire house because we lack the tools, talent and interest. Instead we are being very strategic about our efforts. Unless a realtor can convince us that painting the entire interior would significantly increase our return, we are going to contain our painting efforts to the bathrooms and Timmy's bedroom. With one bathroom done, I feel like we made significant progress towards our goal.

100 days

 Yesterday I learned that the final words my brother heard before he was shot were filled with racial hate. I am not terribly surprised to learn about the racist recording that was captured on the body cam footage, but the news still brought me to my knees. The tragedy of Jae's death continues to compound. Trying to find a silver lining, I am holding onto possibility of hate crimes may be added to the mix of charges that the police officer is facing for murdering my brother. 

Of course, we will have to break through the 'blue wall' first, and that feels absolutely impenetrable. The establishment is designed to protect the police and all those involved. I may never break down the wall, but I can make a hell of a lot of noise around it!

On a positive side, yesterday marked 100 days until Christmas. My Countdown Snowman, which has become quite the tradition in our family, is now proudly waving in my living room. Be warned, because time is going to fly between now and Santa!

Weekend Wrap-Up

 Saturday morning I woke early and headed to pick up Robby. He asked to come home for the night because he needed more 'supplies' from his room and he wanted a home cooked meal. I love that he is only 80 minutes away. The close proximity makes honoring these requests a lot easier!

Even though he was only home for 30 hours, it was wonderful having a full house again. Saturday evening we built another fire and roasted marshmallows around the fire pit for hours. Robby has already accumulated quite a few experiences and stories during his month away. It was fun hearing him and Timmy exchange school stories. 

Yesterday evening Scott drove Robby back to school while Timmy and I went out on a special date for cheese fries and sodas. (He is still a very cheap date.) By the time Scott pulled back into the driveway the fire pit was blazing and more marshmallows were being roasted. Unfortunately the rain is supposed to roll into the area today so our fire pit will be out of commission for awhile.

Between spending time with Robby and cooking his favorite foods, we managed to get a few more boxes packed. In order to keep everybody focused on the goal, we have decided that we are only packing right now. We are trying to abstain from acquiring anything new or bring anything out of storage until we move. I did break one self-imposed rule by unpacking and setting up my Countdown Snowman. 

Who knows? Maybe he will be plugged into an entirely different house by Christmas!

Firepit

 While I have been busy with my day job, Scott has been working towards getting us ready to move. Because the weather has been gorgeous he has taken the opportunity to rake out the flower beds, trim the bushes and clear out the woods. Timmy has been more than happy to assist his efforts by constructing and overseeing a fire pit each evening after school. 

Unfortunately, Scott tweaked his back while raking. I ended up tucking him into bed with ibuprofen and two ice packs. Hopefully his muscles will have relaxed overnight so that he can be comfortable again. Even when the pain wanes, he is out of the cleaning line-up for the foreseeable future. Getting old stinks!

September 11 traditions

 Today is September 11.  

Traditionally each year we have baked cookies and delivered them to our local firehouse to honor the events of 9/11. I began this tradition when Robby was 5 months old and I was trying to come up with a way to explain the significance of the day without evoking fear. While we are baking the cookies we always discuss the heroes that rose up during that horrible morning. It's an odd tradition I admit, but it has worked for us.

This year Robby is honoring 9/11 on his college campus. To say that I miss him this morning would be a massive understatement. While I know that he is where he needs to be, I miss him. His absence is especially noticeable this morning when he would typically be helping me measure flour and crack eggs. I know that Timmy is going to miss him this morning when he has to deliver the cookies by himself. (He becomes very shy.)

This is the 19th year that I have baked cookies with the kids on September 11th. Timmy set out all of the ingredients last night in anticipation of baking this morning. Our local firehouse will be expecting our yearly visit.  I recognize that skipping this year is not  an option although I would be remiss if I didn't acknowledge that my heart is not in.

I continue to struggle with anger and frustration with the police establishment. My brother was murdered by a police officer, somebody who swore an oath to protect him. The good will that was established by the visits of "Officer Friendly" through my childhood evaporated the moment the murderer with a badge pulled the trigger. 

Honoring all "first responders" feels disingenuous this year. I've learned all too intimately that wearing a badge does not define somebody as a good person. Politically incorrect as it may be, I don't want to and I will not honor the police. As far as I'm concerned, the police can bake their own damn cookies and choke them down with their qualified immunity.

I am continuing to bake and deliver the cookies today because I believe it is important for Timmy to honor 9/11. Our baking dialog this year will focus on the fire fighters and the everyday heroes that helped on that horrible day. We are delivering the cookies to our local firehouse because I appreciate the efforts of our volunteer force. However, I am delivering the cookies after 4 pm today because the police officers the firehouse at 3 pm. I'm delighted that our cookies will be enjoyed exclusively by members of the fire department this year.

I waffled about what to do this year but I landed on upholding our tradition.  Perhaps next year I will hold a different perspective. I pray that is the case because I don't like feeling this angry and distrustful every single time I see a badge. In the meantime, I feel good about honoring our fire department while bypassing the 'men and women in blue.'

More Prep

 The temperatures have begun to plummet, leaving frost on the grass and forcing the leaves to begin to cascade from their branches. I love autumn at our house. Although I am excited to move and to create a fresh start, I will miss our beautiful views when the leaves begin to change. Our yard and neighborhood are gorgeous when the leaves change into their autumn outfits. 

Today the dumpster will be removed, although Scott and I have agreed that we will need to order another before our move is complete. (In our defense, about half of this dumpster is filled with the carpet that we ripped up in the basement, not our clutter.) With the large broken furniture removed, I feel like we are making huge progress towards our move. 

With the dumpster full and the weather cooperating, Scott has turned his efforts to landscaping.  He spent the day looping small branches and cleaning out flower beds. Timmy has been more than happy to 'help' our efforts by burning the yard debris in fire fit. Our yard has not looked this nice since we moved in nearly 20 years ago.

After work today we will go and pick out new flooring for the basement. It feels like it is getting real!

Laid Back but Fun

The weather this weekend was amazing. The temperatures were warm but not hot, the sun was a happy yellow against a bright blue sky and the bugs have already begun to dissipate. We took full advantage and spent the majority of the weekend outside playing and burning sticks in the fire pit. (Timmy was especially happy with the fire pit, which is among his favorite activities.)

We began our fun outdoor 'staycation' on Friday afternoon as soon as school was over. We packed up Friend, picked up food from McDonald's and drove to the local park for a picnic. I'm honestly not sure who was more excited with a picnic at the park, Timmy or Friend. While Timmy munched on fries and a cheeseburger, Friend was happily chasing every squirrel and random moving leaf in the park. 

Timmy and Friend spent Saturday was spent playing around the yard and burning sticks in the fire pit. Scott and I worked in the basement and garage, trying to sort the junk from the memories. We have made a lot of progress, but I have to admit that I was unprepared for the emotions involved. As I was packing up the games for donation, I found myself overwhelmed with memories and sentiments. Thankfully some s'mores on the fire pit were the perfect remedy for my tears.

Sunday I drove to visit Robby for lunch. It was wonderful to see him, to hear about his friends and his classes and to spend a few hours away from campus. He is doing well and I could not be more proud. That being said, I miss his daily presence around our house. I know I will get used to the new living situation, but that doesn't mean it is easy.